Today, my family of five and I decided to have homemade sushi. We did not prepare the fish correctly, and now we all have excruciating food poisoning. The worst part? We only have one bathroom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML
Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML
Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML
Today, I and several housemates have food poisoning. From what? Last night's Subway, which we only got to avoid eating the pork that was possibly bad as none of us wanted to be sick. FML
Today, I was hit by acute food poisoning while attending a colleague's birthday party at his home. The toilet had a door that wouldn't close all the way, there were only three sheets of toilet paper left, and I had to walk home through town, in a dress, with my soiled underwear in a plastic bag. FML
Today, I spent all day and last night in the bathroom. The seafood I'd been keeping in the refrigerator apparently had gone bad, and is now intent on finding its every possible route to the Great Porcelain Whirlpool. FML
Today, I got food poisoning from a restaurant that I had chosen for our company party. Everyone who went blamed me for their predicament. I also had to run to the toilet every ten minutes while they were all mad at me. FML
Today, I tried to cook a nice meal for my sister's friends. It turned out perfect and they enjoyed it, while I was in the bathroom throwing up for two hours due to food poisoning. FML
Today, I’m at my hometown for the weekend and bought my entire family takeaway for lunch without knowing my mom had cooked. Later, after finding out, I promised to eat it for dinner. Guess who is having food poisoning but can’t shit. The cramps are killing me. FML
Today, I got food poisoning from my wedding food. FML
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Top comments
SuperDerp 8
What a cool and original pun about food poisoning.... This has not been said on other food poisoning FMLs or anything....
mazzera_fml 7
Something fishy is going on.
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Comments (171)
liahbby 7
how do you not prepare sushi correctly? its fresh raw fish and white rice i think maybe you just bought a fish that was probably starting to rot
stonedfishies 10
Find the nearest gas stations! Lol.
ogle5431 1
There's a reason sushi chefs study many years before being allowed to work in restaurants.
bloodangel494 1
every man for himself lol.
adrianarog 2
Bridesmaids moment... Haha
SammyS2012 21
Unless you're an amazing cook, I would think it is unwise to make sushi at home... At least that's my thought.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
A five-person family with only one bathroom? That doesn't make sense...But regardless, NEVER make sushi yourself unless you're an expert. It's very tricky and it's raw fish, and as you found out, it's easy to screw it up to where it makes you sick.
Rikki27 5
For all of you saying that you should leave the sushi making to those who are chefs in restaurants, this is extremely wrong! Sushi can be very easy if, as others sai previously, the fish is sushi grade. From there all you need is good rice, seaweed, and all the other little yummies!! Don't be discouraged OP!
SammyS2012 21
The only reason I thought that it needs to be left to professionals is because of the risk of making it wrong; raw fish can lead to worms and other things if you dont know what you're doing. If it seriously is something that anyone can do, then I stand corrected. I'm no chef myself.
darthdamian2 4
Bridesmaids references popped in my head
LeCommentator 1
If you all prepared cuttlefish, you're screwed. Eating unproperly cooked cuttlefish would kill a person.