Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
It's sus
Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML
Heartless swine
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML
Fond memories
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style position was fun, it made him wonder what it would be like to rape a girl. FML
The Great Pretender
Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML
No gods, no masters
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Nomnom
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML
Top comments
nixter5 18
Please don't tell me you used teeth.
clownphobia23 12
...What the heck?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (241)
nixter5 18
Please don't tell me you used teeth.
Meowingtons500 18
Poor guy. :/
Damn_Hippster 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You suck! *pun defiantly intended*
skyguy89 0
T.T sound scary....
Dojan 16
Definitely*
BeefyQueef 5
This FML sounds like a load of shit to me.
aceman1992 9
Luckily no one asked you then 36.
HahaHokayThen 10
Maybe he was just disturbed at the thought of losing his oral virginity?
CanWeMicrowaveIt 11
If you havin head problems, I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but a biter aint one.
changesinme 0
Some people bite of chunks white eating ice cream, bad reference 'like eating an ice cream' may have caused this situation
aceman1992 9
Where did the other comments go?
fluorescentadole_fml 8
could have been "defiantly"
palmih10 0
Hey
aceman1992 9
Bye.
keepingitnasty 15
You heard me just fine.
Llamacod 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Yes, cause google is the epitome of references.
USMC_FTW 3
85, they were removed like yours will be ;p
kaprookie 3
I hope to god you didn't use teeth OP. That's ****** up.
Jovecove 13
Traumatic experience for him.. You evil woman!
margie2194 12
It's not rape. Just violent sex... BDSM?
wikkedphuka 0
so the same when ur eating a p**y pretend its a yummy taco only dnt bite it
xXxIracebethxXx 14
#153 Wasn't that funny but still liked the pun, Haha. OP - Think of it this way; He loved the ******* so much, he was at a loss for words and just laid there in that fetal position because it was too magnificent to even imagine having another just like it... Or like #1 said, hopefully you didn't use teeth :)
bluejay22 4
the teeth thing all depends on the guy. and you dont want to scrape your teeth along his dick just lightly run them and only do it occasionally.
NOTquiteRAMBO 10
Still counts!
eili_fml 0
kinky ;)
glenzhao2 16
Were you that bad, OP? Was he shaking and whimpering as well?
DynamicDave 11
Ok, I see this on FML a lot and I just want to clear this up: There is nothing wrong with using teeth! It actually adds a lot I think. It's when you're actually dragging your teeth there's a problem. Also, my fiancée likes when I bite her gently during oral. The fact that YOU don't enjoy teeth doesn't mean no one does.
Rapt0rJesus 0
What? Speak up nigga'.
FreshlyCut 0
Black girls always get like 30 plus thumbs down
reaganomics 6
Well one of two things happened, you went down on him like a killer whale chewing a baby seal.....OR.....you were so good it was like getting the first slice of apple pie straight out of the oven and he had to recuperate after the BJ of a lifetime.....either way he now has a kick ass story
Torva_fml 16
Shoulda stuck a Q-tip up his ass... That woulda got him moving.
aceman1992 9
156- Are you 12?
nixter5 18
Oh my god!!! 371 thumbs up??? I will remember this forever, I love you all!!
baseball6917 8
love sucks...true love swallows.
eeppiicc 8
156, you forgot a * there are two S's.
sparkle16 4
Hey message me;)
MetroidSlayer01 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
**** his life then
IndigoAcrylic 9
Woah man! I just totally looked at your profile pic in a dirty way... LORD SAVE ME ! xD
aceman1992 9
If you going down on him in anyway involved a thumb or finger inserted into a certain spot, I could see that being rape. Otherwise no.
aliaskis 3
Some guys like that ;)
HaloR 0
Cool name
aceman1992 9
Nobody likes it unexpectedly however.
gregorrok1 0
Stop stroking his head! He's obviously scared of you.
DjeePee 25
"If you going down on him in anyway involved a thumb or finger inserted into a certain spot, I could see that being rape. Otherwise no." Well, it is rape if she gave him head while he didn't want it...
JavIin 0
97- Googles definition of rape is; "The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, esp. by the threat or use of violence." Therefore no, technically she did not rape him, for that is impossible. :p
ninjapiratejesus_fml 20
I'm pretty sure that a woman can be accused of rape too... Otherwise the justice system would be pretty screwed up.
Shrike 24
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/rape http://oxforddictionaries.com/definition/rape Try harder, dipshit.
Baytheshark 14
You all should not have ruled out the possibility that OP is a boy.
Rainbow35 6
120: It says it was submitted by "Anonymous (woman)" so OP's not a guy.
ikickgingers 15
28- haha I thought it was a codpiece at first
AliCat18 12
Javlin- a women can rape a man. there was a case about 3 women raping a man last year in South Africa. I'll spare the details of how they managed to do it but it is possible!
aceman1992 9
97- your telling me OP managed to force that guy to take all his clothes off and then go down on him against his will? Your argument has no logic.
MetroidSlayer01 8
Hehe 69 likes
jab7769 8
What guy doesn't want head
clownphobia23 12
...What the heck?
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Better luck next time? :)
Snafuusmc 12
he's in shock.
SSgt 0
He's mentally damaged after a very traumatic experience.
tarabelle 7
I'm confused..why would he do that?
cutielilangel 8
I pretty much am too. Confused that is. Most all guys like when their girl goes down on him no? Unless you were really that bad or bit chunks out? Lol -_-
flockz 20
bit chunks out of it? what the ****?
BeefyQueef 5
Remind me to never let 26 give me a bj.
OriginalimoaN 15
It is very possible something bad actually happened to him.. Geez, doesn't anyone watch detective shows ever?
CanWeMicrowaveIt 11
Do you really need to be reminded after that mental image?
amanda_d95 9
63- don't you think he would've told her to stop then? Unless he was really scared an his girlfriends very intimidating, but I wouldn't wanna do anything with someone who intimidated me
KiddNYC1O 22
Why do you proudly toss poop in your pic? ;)
tarabelle 7
Ummm...you mean leaves? Because I wanted too(:
KiddNYC1O 22
I was obviously kidding but okay =].
OneNightStan 2
Maybe he just found out he was gay...
t_o_d_a_y 0
maybe op is hannibal lectra
MerkathonPro 0
... I'm pretty sure he liked it...
leogirl95 12
You were so good he didn't know what to do with himself afterwards?
ThatGenericGuy 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
It's not rape if he liked it.
jillianmathers12 13
That's exactly what I was thinking!
xxmollyxx 25
Obviously he didn't like it, though
narrowords 18
There's one very obvious way to tell whether he liked it or not, but OP didn't give us that detail.
systems7 2
It's not rape if you yell surprise while you do it.
ThatSceneKid1313 9
Aren't BJ's supposed to make you feel good?
BIEBERSLAYER 10
If he was in the fetal position I doubt he enjoyed it.
flockz 20
if a girl scraped her teeth up and down my ****, i wouldn't enjoy it.
rhysfucker 24
A gentle tip nibble is another thing, however...
DarylAndrew 2
What if it was so good he lost his mind
mk58 31
You hurt his little man, didn't you?! You evil woman!
GraveRobber14 13
Your picture made your comment so much funnier XD lmfao
imaninja1 9
Agreed ^^
Jason199615 0
Maybe he feels guilty?
Metteris 0
Why would he feel guilty? It doesn't seem like they did anything wrong. They are in a relationship and all :)
knaevery 17
Maybe he's very religious or something, and they decided to do it but afterwards/during he decided it was sinful, therefore felt guilty?
anna15243 6
why?