Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style position was fun, it made him wonder what it would be like to rape a girl. FML
Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML
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Top comments
nixter5 18
Please don't tell me you used teeth.
clownphobia23 12
...What the heck?
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Comments (241)
Arxikist 3
Maybe he saw your tranny dick and that threw him.
YayFlameWarz 9
PLEASE TELL ME YOU DIDN'T BUTE DOWN!
YayFlameWarz 9
bite* now that ive publically humiliated myself; Testicles, that is all.
PoisonGirlInc 0
Was it really that bad?!?!
troublegum 21
irony - saying your life sucks as that seems to be the route of the timing of your problem.
DeathBunny218 37
i'm surprised more people haven't said this, it's the first thing i thought of xD
fartgun 3
RAPE IS SO FUNNY
1bluesky1 6
You've got a real man there OP..
BigSlingin 0
WTF
roseXthorns 8
Did the word 'no' come up at any time?
CorpLaw77 3
Maybe it wasn't that she used teeth... might she possibly have braces? Ouch
mikeymayhem_87 15
Poor guy. I hope she didn't bite off more than she could chew!