Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
It's sus
Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML
Heartless swine
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML
Fond memories
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style position was fun, it made him wonder what it would be like to rape a girl. FML
The Great Pretender
Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML
No gods, no masters
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Nomnom
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML
Top comments
nixter5 18
Please don't tell me you used teeth.
clownphobia23 12
...What the heck?
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Comments (241)
perdix 31
The bad ******** is one of the most heart-breaking events in a man's life. Not even the butchest Marine has the courage to complain about a woman's oral technique when his **** is caught between a set of meat-ripping and slicing set of choppers. We had to suffer in silence and pretend to like it.
rhysfucker 24
Perdix, you're spot on! The time for BJ coaching is definitely after the fact. Additionally, you don't want to hurt your cocksucker's feelings; you want them to get better.
smydiwannafthata 5
You can go down on me instead.
CrazyRu 0
I feel so bad for both you and your boyfriend!
darkspider7 2
It's not rape it's surprise sex!
keepingitnasty 15
Rape is such an ugly word, thats why I always call it a "struggle cuddle."
ari10 1
Man with a creepy picture say what??!
keepingitnasty 15
You heard me just fine cheif...
tjvalero 0
Ouch that's a slap in the face to you:/ maybe you shouldn't do that anymore
AllDaysLost182 0
So.. It was good then?
DirtyJerzey8083 7
Wtf is wrong with him? He doesn't like head? Did u rake him?
luckyducky_7sq 10
Yeah, what a hoe!
t_laplante3 5
Maybe girls are just not for him?
32enos 0
Atta baby!!