Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, after making out with this guy, our tongue piercings got stuck together. After about five minutes of trying to unlock them, I accidentally vomited a little in his mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. His partly digested nachos decided to make an appearance halfway through. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML
Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML
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Top comments
Drigr 9
Poor guy.. He needs to work on that, I would hate to not be able to french kiss my girl.
Kallian_fml 21
Well damn. How long is your tongue?
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Comments (120)
paintballnuts 5
Maybe stick to French toast all the best op
Meme1988 18
Thats so:(omg i feel so bad for both of you
dangousity 21
Long tongue?
doodlecloud 27
Mega sucks but I'm betting the problem was less his 'very sensitive gag reflex' and more the fact that you stuck your tongue waaay to far in. You did say it was your first time after all. Don't worry though, you'll get better with practice. Don't pretend it wasn't at least partly your fault though as then you'll never learn!
pdp_fml 21
I can still remember "frenching" with my future wife, while we were dating around 40 years ago. Try,try again! You should just not try to go too far into his mouth as to initiate his gag reflex.
Tuffay 14
Do you still have the shirt? I used to have the same one...
pdp_fml 21
Wow, you must be as old as I am. Welcome baby boomer to the FML site!
katties 27
I hope you kissed him the proper way: "tongue touching" and not sticking your tongue far into his mouth... right? No, but seriously, sometimes that can happen if he tried to swallow at the same time as you stuck your tongue in, which in rare cases actually leads to... that.
Twisted_Angel 17
Just be glad he ralphed moments later, and not at that exact moment... because that would have been really nasty.
Special_Psycho 8
Well, I'm sure you'll be able to survive not French-kissing. It's a bit sad and still a bit annoying.
xplainphrox 8
Ouch! Not that this would be his issue, but my brother once tried to "be straight" so was dating his bestest female friend... They got to kissing, and he barely avoided retching in her mouth... Some times, it is what it is... Sorry for ya just the same..!
tumorgrrl 3
I guess it's good that you lack a penis....