Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate for the first time. He was sucking on my boob, everything was going good. He suddenly stopped and started choking really bad. He thought milk was coming out. Turns out, it was just his gum. The moment was ruined. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML
Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML
Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML
Today, I was eating lunch with my boyfriend when I started choking. My boyfriend took it as an opportunity to sneak food off my plate. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, in an effort to avoid my school's strict no-gum policy as my teacher made a b-line to me, I swallowed it. By the time the teacher reached me, the gum was on my desk, as well as my breakfast, thanks to my overactive gag reflex. FML
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Top comments
queen_awks 16
You could have just spat it out instead...
DocBastard 40
So now your boyfriend knows that you spit instead of swallowing.
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Comments (99)
DjMonroe95 11
Smh
Corrupt_waffles 13
I am so glad you were able to give something intelligent back to the FML community.
YaboyVinnie 21
Be glad it was gum and not the c-version of it.
ApologyKick 25
Chewing gum? haha no I'm assuming you mean either cud which would be terrible or also chewing tobacco which would also end tragically.
Pyapi 20
Not sure whether you are incredibly innocent or just trying to make a joke
enchi999 8
What makes you think OP performed oral before kissing him?
ICastillo 25
I don't know what you mean #2? Chocolate or caramel or coconuts? I'm in the dark here.
daniel_dd31 13
Chewing cum really? Is that suppose to be funny?
happle 21
I'm sure it would have killed on the school bus.
YepThatsMeee 23
Is it preschool day here?? What's with all the up votes for #5 and down votes for #12??
Likian5 26
It's called having a sense of humor.
queen_awks 16
You could have just spat it out instead...
witchdoctor1 9
Apparently OP likes to swallow
TheElBurrrito 21
She's apparently not good at either of those.
Damian95 16
I knew it would be bad as soon as I read "swallowed my gum"...that and it bein an FML and all.
SashaAwk 3
Spitters are quitters
THExistentialist 13
preach it? xD
DJrEddyLeb 7
You should of just spat it out... Smart one xD
leadawg75 12
You could have read the comment above yours, smart one.
TheRandomIndian 17
You could have read the comment above yours, smart one.
Poppipuff 14
You could have comment the smart above yours, read one.
DJrEddyLeb 7
Umm lol? We posted them at the same time? Dont u know whats a coincidence? Smh
CharresBarkrey 16
I didn't thumb you down because you said the same thing, I thumbed you down because you said "should of."
TheRandomIndian 17
59 you posted it 2 minutes later.
apollojon 11
Meaning #6 opened the comments, didn't see #3, waited a few minutes WITHOUT refreshing the page... then commented. Coincidence? Its possible :P
ScaughtieHolden 11
"Don't you know what is a coincidence?"
hienzburgess 9
I don't understand how you ended up spitting it on his face. We're you still making out with him while choking?
enchi999 8
OP would have stopped kissing him if she was choking.
Marvin_Kay 10
*were
dectivebobby 6
smooth move op...
DjMonroe95 11
Sexy..I guess?
Pyapi 20
Because spitting out the gum requires too much efforts, that's why
BubbleGrunge 18
What about "hold on hot stuff, let me dispose of my gum?"
fylx100 19
Exactly. Now it's a bad/embarrassing thing to be caught chewing gum by your boyfriend?
TheRandomIndian 17
Maybe he gets angry whenever she has something else in her mouth
happle 21
Then she'd probably get a new boyfriend.
NickaPLZ 26
Would've been so much easier to just say "let me get rid of my gum."