Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and walked out. This is two days after she informed me that she is unexpectedly pregnant. FML
Today, my coworker is two months pregnant. I used condoms with her every time, so I’m not sure how the fuck it happened. I’m the only man she’s been with. I tried to give her money for an abortion but she insists on keeping it. She knows damn well I have a real wife and kids, and I can’t afford to lose them. FML
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML
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Top comments
Wheredidgrungego 12
She just didn't want the baby to be poked by your ****.
blueocean43 2
Some women keep having periods when they are pregnant, maybe she is one of them.
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Comments (427)
darkmis1 18
It's possible to have your period when you're still in your first trimester, so she might not be lying.
rainbabyrain 3
it's still possible to have your period and be pregnant
gttogo2003 0
yes it is. though it won't be the " normal" kind of flow for that particular woman.
stephy228 0
Bahahahaha
Jimminee 3
I'm sorry she couldn't be bothered to come up with a better lie.
captainbj2 0
Wow...do people really mean these things? Yes, shw can still have a period. Yes, having sex while pregnant WILL NOT hurt the baby. No, you cannot get pregnant while pregnant. Yes, men still have urges and want to have sex with their wives who are pregnant. No, that is not being selfish. Yes, Jerking off will help the situation.
Poliahputz 0
Wow.......nuff said
kykyshay 0
congratulations?
lilody_fml 0
women can have there period all through their pregnancy. use your hand instead
shelbybabyy8 0
Well, yes you can bleed while you are pregnant like a lot of people are saying...is that an excuse? I don't know.. She could be grossed out by the thought, or she just doesn't want to have sex. To the person that said "having sex while you are pregnant is like having sex with the baby", you're an idiot.. lol. It won't hurt the baby at all and it isn't like having sex with the baby.
gttogo2003 0
contrary to popular belief it's very common for woman in their first trimester to have a period. but I agree that if you into flying with red wings then she should let you.
rattusrattus 19
Dude, no. Sex should be between two consenting partners. Maybe you just used bad wording but that sounds like you think the woman should 'let' the man have sex irregardless of her own feelings. I really want to give you the benefit of the doubt rather than think of you as one of those people who view women as property and for the use and pleasure of men.