Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and walked out. This is two days after she informed me that she is unexpectedly pregnant. FML
Today, my coworker is two months pregnant. I used condoms with her every time, so I’m not sure how the fuck it happened. I’m the only man she’s been with. I tried to give her money for an abortion but she insists on keeping it. She knows damn well I have a real wife and kids, and I can’t afford to lose them. FML
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML
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Top comments
Wheredidgrungego 12
She just didn't want the baby to be poked by your ****.
blueocean43 2
Some women keep having periods when they are pregnant, maybe she is one of them.
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Comments (427)
CaityHomes 0
Also u can have ur period and be pregnant
KaskStunter 4
I don't think you are supposed to have sex during the first 3 months of pregnancy, it is considered dangerous.
AjsMommy7204 6
Yes That Does Suck.. But When I Was Preg My Periods Never Change.. Very Weird.. But It DoeD Happen... Sorry Op !!
puddy_fml 0
I also blame Bush. And all ignorant tea baggers everywhere.
doodlez223 1
1) Sex while you are pregnant is not in any way gross or dangerous. It does not hurt the baby at all. 2) YOU CAN NOT HAVE A PERIOD WHILE YOU ARE PREGNANT!!!!! Some women may continue to bleed a bit, but it is not a period. During a woman's period, the lining of the uterus is being shed.
doodlez223 1
That can't happen during pregnancy. Bleeding at all is abnormal and while not necessarily dangerous, it should be evaluated by a doctor. If you don't believe me, google it or ask any medical professional. You can not menstruate while pregnant.
Runawaygirl83 0
Try being a little more sensitive, you dick. Some women never stop having periods throughout their entire pregnancy.
beezydabeezy 0
Well you can have bleeding while pregnant that is not harmful. so really the issue here is that your wife is stupid enough to think that is her period.
katdiz73 0
some women still experience a period and some light spotting especially this early on in pregnancy, so you should cut her some slack.
itssmarisheesh 0
you can still have your period while your pregnant dummy look it up