Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. My dad took one look at him, sighed and said, "You deserve someone better. Someone who is responsible, and has their priorities straight in life." Beyond upset, I told my dad that I love him. My dad disgruntledly responded, "I was talking to him." FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML
Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML
Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. Turns out his dad is the asshole customer that I complain about all the time. He recognized me too and spent the entire dinner making passive-aggressive remarks about how bad of an employee I am. FML
Today, I introduced my dad to my boyfriend. I gave my dad the middle finger and he thumped me on the head, as we've been playfully doing for years. My boyfriend got all mad and tried to fight my dad. FML
Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML
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Top comments
emvictoria 9
My dad pretty much said the same thing.. But said get out while you can.. I'm sure your dad was just mucking around.. My boyfriend freaked out when my dad said it.. But 3 years later and we are still together :)
boofgall 16
Damn Alan, I'd love to meet you. Sadly, I'm in Canada. :(
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Comments (105)
boofgall 16
Damn Alan, I'd love to meet you. Sadly, I'm in Canada. :(
emvictoria 9
My dad pretty much said the same thing.. But said get out while you can.. I'm sure your dad was just mucking around.. My boyfriend freaked out when my dad said it.. But 3 years later and we are still together :)
Jakesterk96 8
That's when you say "takes one to know one". Ah, third grade humor.
maryam8869 7
I hope you two get married :)
Monkeybuttcream 4
Or say, "I know but she'll suck anything" ( make sure to give him the Creep McCreeperson wink)
TexasMud 8
Wth #3 we've only been dating for a year. FML
SupahAsian 4
57 - Or, "it takes one to make one?"
SaMmIMonster96 6
That is such a sweet story :) I hope you and your boyfriend have many happy years together
Pentium_4 27
wow, what a douche. my ex's dad was similar
EatnBeef 7
Doesn't matter had secks! If you hadn't made it that far then I just made myself look like a dumbass.
Pentium_4 27
i did ;) and you have a steak in your avatar....you're anything but a dumbass
mynameisshow 4
Foreshadow?
Cherryripe25 5
on the bright side, at least he doesn't have a gun collection to display?
corytheg 6
Cool sounds like a good date
yahoowizard 16
Isn't he insulting his daughter there?
kaelynxboo 0
Good job noticing the obvious!(:
alexh15 13
Confucius says...
poprocksss73 7
Egg mcmuffins are the shit
AcidLacedBong 5
Sounds like your dad has a sense of humor to me...
mandarine_fml 3
tell him: you're an idiot for conceive me
mandarine_fml 3
my english is very bad so I did not understand :(
ladyLALAA 29
Lost in translation, I see where you were goin with it though! Thumbs up from me :)
mandarine_fml 3
hell, in russian it was funny but my brain is too small to express it properly
GoW_Chick 15
Russians are awesome in my opinion, I am reading your comment in a Russian accent, thumbs up, I wish I could give you more than one.