Today, I ran over a cat while driving home. I tried to keep myself together but couldn't help but cry because of how bad I felt. Through my tears I failed to notice a porcupine in the middle of the road. Yep, I hit him too. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I saw a poor helpless cat in the middle of the road while driving. I pulled over and scooped it in my arms to bring it to safety. Not only did I get mauled and scratched by the cat, my car also wasn't put in park and rolled away hitting a parked car. FML
Today, I was backing out of my snowy drive way on my way to work. I thought I hit a lump of snow. I'd run over my white cat. FML
Today, I accidentally ran over a squirrel on the road. I was late for work so I didn't stop. Later, someone keyed the word PETA into the side of my car. FML
Today, I swerved to avoid running over a dead cat in the road. Instead, I ran over its head. The crack of its skull was loud enough for me to hear it. FML
Today, I swerved to miss hitting a kitten, over-corrected, hit and killed the cat, and totaled my truck by hitting a parked car. FML
Today, my cat got outside and had the bright idea to walk in the middle of the road, right as a car was coming. The driver didn't notice him, so I had to sprint over there, leap into the road, and toss my cat to safety. He's fine, aside from being soaked (he landed in a puddle), but I've felt better. FML
Today, I had to take my cat to the vet. On the way there, he managed to get out of his cage, climb into the front seat, onto my chest, and howl in my face as I tried to drive down the highway. I ended up with stitches and still got charged for missing my cat's appointment. FML
Today, while driving home I saw a few deer running beside me. I stopped to let them go in front. Instead, one face-plants, ramming into the side of my new car. FML
Today, while going for a walk, I saw two bunnies next to the road. Apparently, I was scarier than the oncoming traffic, because one of them decided to sprint into the road as I walked by. I could hear its bones crunch as it got hit by a car. FML
Today, I swerved out of the way to avoid hitting a squirrel, and in the process hit another squirrel. FML
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Top comments
lizzzie_fml 0
You cry while driving - you pull over! YDI.
danielrp34 7
Good.....Let the evil run through you.....
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Comments (271)
disney_blonde 16
Pull over if you can't control your emotions. What it it had been a person?
disney_blonde 16
Stop hitting things in the road and you'll have nothing to cry over.
1R1X0X0 10
Two attempts ans still not funny. Stop trying please.
Assassin4than 0
everyone here saying atleast it wasnt a human should be ashamed. what makes a human more important than any cat or porcupine.
ElMundio87 0
I would have thought this was pretty obvious.
fretforyerlatte 0
well, for starters if it was a person you're probably heading to jail, or at least paying out tons of cash if you didn't kill them.
rayrayy_fml 0
The level of stupidity these days appalls me. Homework exercise: Run over a squirrel, Then run over a baby. "o lol a baebi iz no moar inportint then a aminal!!1! lolzlolzlolz! humins riun teh wurld catz wud do a betr job!!!!!!!!" Go **** yourself.
liveitlearnit 0
Two words: Opposable thumbs. That shit is important. I'd also cry if I ran over an Orangutan. Although, that's pretty unlikely in suburban New York...
XOfiestypixie 0
It's programmed into our minds that we're the most important species, because we have developed brains that allow for the invention of new technology, along with our opposable thumbs and ability to reason, we believe it to be true. However, we are still animals, categorized as mammals. We also are taught that we're at the top of the food chain (probably because of guns), but there are plenty of other animals out there that wouldn't mind eating us if we gave them a chance. So in other words, nobody will ever win this argument of whether or not humans are more important than any other animal, since it is programmed into our brains that we are, and has been for thousands of years.
novella0013 0
#38, nobody on this post has talked like that besides you. I think we all have a certain amount of knowledge on grammar, even those of us with higher morals than those of you who don't care about taking the life of an animal that isn't human. Yes, humans are animals. Dolt.
F_fatchick_lives 0
Ever heard of sarcasm..........
1R1X0X0 10
To be honest, I'd probably run over #38 for that comment. Please don't reproduce yourself. You're a shame for society.
Loanshark 0
pussy who gives a shit about two animals
BioProject 0
#16, exactly what level of a dumbass are you?
ohmygawdz 0
I miss my kitty :(
SimpleSimon 0
It was delicious.
Ozmat 0
Oh my god. How can you do that? FYL though, because you were upset&sorry®retful&didn't mean to, etc. I'd hate to run over an animal :o
my_fml_account 2
As someone who has lost a cat to drivers in the past, I hope you continue to feel horrible for days. poor cat & porcupine :'(
Ligerie 0
ummm...she did feel horrible. Hence the crying part. Maybe you take care better care of your cats and then people who shouldn't have to worry about them in the street won't drive over them. Its not like she used Fluffy for target practice.
Caitlyn36 8
what do you mean you hope she feels horrible for days? it was an accident, and no matter how much you love your pets, it's not her fault your cat got run over so you shouldnt be trying to make her feel bad.
Rhad 0
That's funny. I've run over a porcupine also, I didn't kill him but i wounded it so bad I ended up feeling guilty leaving it crippled, so I shot it in the head and threw it in a stream.
divineinstrument 2
That's actually quite nice of you to do that The above comment was completely sincere. It's better to kill an animal than put it in immense pain.
andydawg8891 0
It's just not a FML Comment section unless someone says it: Women Drivers.....terrible.
timtam24 0
NOOOO!!!!! DON'T!!!! The rest of the comments are going to be about how bad women drivers are/ how sexist those people are.
SimpleSimon 0
In fairness, a man probably wouldn't have cried.
timtam24 0
yeah well that would be weird
Lounia_fml 8
Wanna know why woman drivers are so terrible? It's because most of the driving school instructors are guys. Sorry, the truth hurts (:
SimpleSimon 0
110, I can just as easily say 'Know why all driving instructors are guys? Because women are shit at driving!'
LordOfTheHobos 0
110, that makes no sense. Men and women both have the same instructors.
bexox 0
Sigh... I didn't think so before, but now I wonder if cats SHOULD rule the world. Go kill yourselves, sexist *****. What have we learned from posts like these? The world is just like Orwell's Animal Farm, with Snowball and Napoleon. Bunch of damn pigs.
hannahMlover_not 0
i wud of, and im a man
andydawg8891 0
hahaha, I love the arguments that posting sexist comments (even in a sarcastic manner such as this) causes. God Bless You All
assortedkandy 0
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