Today, I ran over a cat while driving home. I tried to keep myself together but couldn't help but cry because of how bad I felt. Through my tears I failed to notice a porcupine in the middle of the road. Yep, I hit him too. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I saw a poor helpless cat in the middle of the road while driving. I pulled over and scooped it in my arms to bring it to safety. Not only did I get mauled and scratched by the cat, my car also wasn't put in park and rolled away hitting a parked car. FML
Today, I was backing out of my snowy drive way on my way to work. I thought I hit a lump of snow. I'd run over my white cat. FML
Today, I accidentally ran over a squirrel on the road. I was late for work so I didn't stop. Later, someone keyed the word PETA into the side of my car. FML
Today, I swerved to avoid running over a dead cat in the road. Instead, I ran over its head. The crack of its skull was loud enough for me to hear it. FML
Today, I swerved to miss hitting a kitten, over-corrected, hit and killed the cat, and totaled my truck by hitting a parked car. FML
Today, my cat got outside and had the bright idea to walk in the middle of the road, right as a car was coming. The driver didn't notice him, so I had to sprint over there, leap into the road, and toss my cat to safety. He's fine, aside from being soaked (he landed in a puddle), but I've felt better. FML
Today, I had to take my cat to the vet. On the way there, he managed to get out of his cage, climb into the front seat, onto my chest, and howl in my face as I tried to drive down the highway. I ended up with stitches and still got charged for missing my cat's appointment. FML
Today, while driving home I saw a few deer running beside me. I stopped to let them go in front. Instead, one face-plants, ramming into the side of my new car. FML
Today, while going for a walk, I saw two bunnies next to the road. Apparently, I was scarier than the oncoming traffic, because one of them decided to sprint into the road as I walked by. I could hear its bones crunch as it got hit by a car. FML
Today, I swerved out of the way to avoid hitting a squirrel, and in the process hit another squirrel. FML
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Top comments
lizzzie_fml 0
You cry while driving - you pull over! YDI.
danielrp34 7
Good.....Let the evil run through you.....
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Comments (271)
Julayy_fml 0
FYL for running over two innocent animals. YDI for not pulling over.
nnnik 0
I feel bad for you, I had to hit a armadillo because I was on a windy road in the middle of no where and I had traffic in every direction around me, it sucks...
z712 0
alliemay 0
You REALLY should have stopped when you ran over the cat, and asked a neighbor about it's family. And you should have pulled over if you were crying so hard. I understand you probably didn't think about the cat because you were so shocked, and you probably didn't realize you needed to pll over since you were trying to stay together... but driving and life/death are serious matters, so next time...
ogiantmanz 0
"yep i hit him too." lololololol!
omgitzadrienne 0
lmao, this seriously just made my day. this has to be one of the funniest fmls i have ever read. all i can think about is what you did after you hit the porcupine, i wish i could have seen your face (no offense), priceless.
om1kr0n 0
Your all stupid to even believe this one.. Porcupine needles are DEFINITELY not durable enough to pop a car tire.
TheHighestCrew 0
LOL... to everyone spouting off about us destroying the planet, and animals don't hurt the planet.. It is natural for us to live in safe weather proof, climate controlled buildings. To drive around in cars. Our intelligence got us out of the rain. It is natural for us to live in our natural environment, just like an animal living in the forest. So hypothetically same situation but there is a kid on one side of the road and a cat on the other, you have too much momentum to slow down in time (happens all the time called "accidents"), so do you kill the kid to save the cat? **** no. Try explaining that to the parents... I saved the cat though! Obviously people are compassionate, I mean she was saddened by the event correct? You think an animal will return that favor? If your an "animal activist" try this. Go up north and find yourself a nice big thousand pound Kodiak Grizzly Bear, you get up in his face and tell him how every life on earth equally deserves to live. Get back to me with the Bears response...
runs_n_squirts69 0
HAHAHA. that was pretty funny and true. animals wouldnt give a **** if they killed us as long as they got something to eat for the day.
Huevo_fml 0
women drivers no survivors jk
Nak14 0
Deep huh? I agree, not all men are sexist. Still, making jokes like that is not funny.