Today, I got a call from my 8 year-old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my son had to call me from his school's principal's office because he was disrupting his health class by laughing whenever the teacher said "Sex". My son is 16. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML
Today, I just got done being yelled at by my son's headteacher and a bunch of parents, all because my 6 year-old son has been arranging kiss dates between his classmates in exchange for sweets and so on. My little pimp in training. Not a proud dad moment. FML
Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML
Today, I got called into the principal's office of my son's school. Why? He'd called his teacher a "fudge packer". No more weekends with his uncle. FML
Today, I found out from her teacher that my daughter in kindergarten gets the little boys in her class to play grown-ups with her. It's basically dry humping and groaning. FML
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, my 4-year-old son's daycare called because he kissed a few girls. They explained he can't walk up and kiss little girls. I thought the situation was under control, until I was called an hour later to remove him from the premises for kissing little boys. FML
Today, my 10-year-old son told me that sometimes he wishes that he could be a girl, so that he could masturbate more easily in public. FML
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Top comments
splice520 4
future pimp
enonymous 9
So did the teacher get a discount?
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Comments (455)
cade_smith 0
oh man thats something hard to deal with. hope you change his school.
imwithya 5
future Charlie sheen????
flysniper77 6
LOL dang. wish I had thot of that lmao
darkslayr114 0
teach him the values of money.....hes not charging enough tell him to raise it to a dollar
OMG_ZOMBIES 15
1. Smart kid....not only does he get girls to touch his junk he also gets lunch money out of it!! lmao 2. This may be late but to those of u saying that the OP should be concerned think...why would the girls pay to touch a boy's 'special area'?What happened that brought this up....why did the girls want to touch it...why were they willing to pay a quarter? Did the boy ask them if the wanted to or was it their proposal?....
kayastein 0
I just read on yahoo news youngest millionaires and most of them all started trying to sell something in school and while they sold slices of gum trying different ways to make a profit .. your child had realized his profit is his privates and money in the pocket..genesis!!
dansco 25
This kid is learning to use his assets very young, so a life as a stripper, hooker or rich bloke awaits... I'm going with the 2nd and a sex addiction! lol
moshie123 0
my idol lol
annigotammo 1
so basically, your son's a prostitute. or I guess a jiggilo
bromdaddy 0
what a champion!