Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran out of underwear and so I went into my mom's drawer to borrow a pair from her. It was then that I found out my mom uses the same vibrator as I do. FML
Today, my mother found my sex toys. To make me "feel better" she showed me hers. FML
Today, my mother-in-law purchased matching Christmas presents for myself and my sister-in-law to open together in front of everyone. Guess who are now the proud owners of matching metal tampon cases. FML
Today, as I was waiting in line to give my mom her birthday present, my dad gave her the exact same gift I'd also bought for her. FML
Today, I finally received the vibrator I ordered online. Too bad they labeled what the item was on the outside of the box, and my dad was the one to pick up the packages. FML
Today, after assuming I'd been scammed, I finally found the vibrator I ordered over 2 months ago. It was in my mom's bedside cabinet. FML
Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I realized that the vibrator we bought got sent to his parents house. He picked it up from them, brought it home, and we discovered that they had already opened the package. They even tried to hide the evidence by re-taping it. FML
Today, I heard my mother and father having sexual intercourse, and I found out that my mother moans the same way as my girlfriend. Guess who I now think about every time my girlfriend moans? FML
Today, we were going around the table, telling everyone what we were thankful for. My girlfriend said she was thankful for her vibrator, because I can't please her like it can. My family thought this was funny. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Conasaur 8
Name tags my friend. Name tags.
funnyguy2697 6
why would you give your girlfriend a vibrator?? Isn't that what you're there for?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (161)
DumbingOfAmerica 9
Why would you even give your girlfriend that gift in front of your parents, if that's what you did. Even if not, how much of a moron are you that you can't remember how you wrapped each gift.
tacojauns 45
it sounds like you gave the presents at the same time with both of them in Front of you why you give your gf a vibrator in front of your mom?
rivaraven 35
Labels...
MitchellK 3
And that's why you always leave a note
sirlime 1
I heard a gasp, but I didn't hear her say she didnt like it heheheh
beth_ebdon 6
You have your girlfriend a vibrator in front of your mum anyway?
evilvagina 9
it's the awkward moment when you see it in the bathroom a few months later, thinking your good lady has left it there you have a quick sniff and a taste and then your mum says she has lost hers, then the true horror sinks in.
daytoday21 10
Umm, I'm hoping for her own sake she would have washed it afterwards...if it still tastes like something you'd be risking infection there...
ocramavaf 15
why would you be giving your girlfriend a vibrator
Obey_StudBoii 23
Lol moms gonna be having alot of fun nights from here on out. Good job lmfao.
king_of_hallowee 2
You will still find the vibrator in your moms box tonight!!