Today, I made a half-hour bike ride to the movie store, only to realize I'd forgotten my money. I made the ride back home, grabbed my money, went back to the store, paid, then made a second ride home. I got home exhausted, and opened the case. They gave me the wrong movie. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML
Today, I bought a new bike from a sporting goods store. I secured the bike in the back seat and slammed the door shut, but I didn't pay close enough attention to the placement of the handlebars. I had to return the bike to pay for the shattered window. FML
Today, I walked two miles to the store, filled my cart with groceries, and got to the cashier… only to find I had forgotten my wallet. I tried to explain but got the nastiest stank-eye from the cashier, the manager, and everyone in line behind me. I walked two miles home, hungry and embarrassed. FML
Today, I went to the movies on a date. I went to pay for the tickets when I realized that I didn't have my wallet. Instead of my boyfriend paying, he laughed and paid for his own ticket. Then he went ahead and saw the movie without me. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my crush, who had asked me out on a date. Assuming he'd pay, I left my money at home. When the time came to buy the tickets, he only bought one for himself. FML
Today, I went to the drugstore on my bike. The chain came off, the pedal punctured the top of my foot and I was bleeding a lot. To add insult to injury, the ATM inside was broken. I got gauze instead of the cash I came for. FML
Today, I brought home my 3D glasses after a movie. I had a laugh about it until I realized that I put my $100 sunglasses in the recycle box outside of the theatre instead. FML
Today, I was on my way home from work and decided to stop at the grocery store. I purchased $200 in groceries and went to put them in my car. I then realized I drove my motorcycle today. FML
Today, when paying for gas, I realized I'd forgotten my wallet back home. After a moment of panic, I managed to remember my card number. I paid, blowing the cute cashier's mind, and drove away, before my car started sputtering and slowed to a crawl. I'd used the wrong fuel. FML
Today, I got a chance to have dinner and a movie with a girl I've liked for a while. I ran late, so in a hurry to make the movie, and trying to be smooth for her, I told the waiter I'd "take care of him" if he made it fast. He did. When he brought the check, I realized I had forgotten my wallet. FML
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Top comments
tzecco 2
And this is why you steal movies from the internet
flying13 6
Did anybody tell you you lost momentum as you went uphill exhausted?
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Comments (107)
wsjoop1119 0
try to make the wrong movie worth your past 4 and a half hour, lol
YourEvilHero 12
hey my mommy drove me to the movie store today.
EvilPotato 15
5 cool story bro, tell that at a party sometime.
robertperson 0
I bet you thought that movie you rented was the movie you wanted Nope! Just Chuck Testa.
TGRandom 5
Ok. Can someone please explain what the hell the "Chuck Testa" stuff is for I live in an internet cave.
ScaughtieHolden 11
I take like two hour long mountain bike rides all the time. Don't be a pussy.
dre_bro11 12
29, I think I've seen you around. You're the one with the pink ribbons on the handlebars and the basket at the front, right?
poet226 3
Nice one, 45 xD
Aim4thebullseye 4
And this is why Netflix was created
Alwayspullout 7
I only came up with 2 hours..??
BShady96 0
Movie stores still exist? Get with the program...
nalia18 8
45 you forgot to add bright yellow jumpsuit
hinchkongfang 0
This could have easily been avoided by checking shit before you go somewhere... Either that or get a car, or download stuff off the Internet, or watching shit on TV!! Suck it up lazy!!
xcarxcrashx 9
81 if he's willing to bike for two hours is that considered lazy?
Daralea 21
Somebody get OP some water...and wsjoop1119 a calculator.
thisisFMLsoFYL 11
*2 hours Unless he went back to fix it. Then 3
Im2Handsom 1
Challenge accepted... ...close enough
Iamnotyourmom 0
Memes are the best.
guitarplayer546 0
I haven't rented a movie In a long time. Netflix is pretty sweet
gabsta 3
well i hope for OP's sake it was a good movie,
Person1233 13
You definitely put this on yourself by forgetting your money in the first place. You are a moron and must accept the consequences, which in this case was- EXERCISING! OH NOOOOOOO!
robertperson 0
Your picture made the oh no in your comment soooooo much funnier.
thisisafunnyname 12
No, he put it on himself by deciding to bike an hour just for a movie.
jellyshoes11 4
Ha, exactly what I was thinking! Be proud of yourself you're in good enough shape to rides our bike that long :) Do that at least two times a week you'll be a beast! Sucks you got the wrong movie, I hope was still good.
flying13 6
Did anybody tell you you lost momentum as you went uphill exhausted?
exleonhart 0
Tha-nk you, for saying that.
tzecco 2
And this is why you steal movies from the internet
EvilPotato 15
"Ah finally...****!
nomnom5559922 0
Don't you check BEFORE leaving the store?
BellaBelle_fml 23
OP should have also checked that they had their wallet before they left for the store in the first place.
nomnom5559922 0
Let's just say they need a lot of ribbons after their finger. :)
absolutegrrr 7
Why would we say that?
guitarplayer546 0
Yeah because no one has ever left the house without forgetting their wallet or left the store with something mixed up.
Buttsexpirate 9
Who needs a hug? And probably a shower?
nomnom5559922 0
Then leading to sex? I'm good.
Miss_Attitude96 24
Well, that was some good exercise.
amberskyz 4
Yeah, your right, **** your life.