Today, my wife sent me a Google Calendar reminder for "sex". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife checked the time while we were having sex. Twice. FML
Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML
Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML
Today, like every other day, my wife doesn't have time for sex because she's too busy on Facebook. Then she bitched me out because "we never have sex anymore." FML
Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML
Today, my wife started checking her email on her Blackberry while we were having sex. FML
Today, my wife is upset at me for having to remind her of her responsibilities. She dropped the ball several times in the past, and she hates that I remind her to prepare for upcoming deadlines. FML
Today, I sent a love message to my wife asking if she was horny. Minutes later, I realized that I sent it to my mother in law. FML
Today, my wife picked up her phone, answered a text, added a few things to her phone's shopping list, and looked at her phone calendar to remind me I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. She did all this whilst my penis was inside her, giving it my best effort as well. Self confidence zero. FML
Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML
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Top comments
pokemyeyes 23
YDI for making her reach the point where she has to schedule herself into your calender and send you reminders.
charlamagnet 9
Be happy your actually having sex OP, Some of us aren't as lucky.
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Comments (69)
Prasanth 5
I think you are too weak at it
alfalfalaffa 17
I don't see the fml here...
booty_sniper 10
And this is supposed to be a bad thing?
QuaDECH 13
I ain't even mad.
LegionRapier61 8
I fail to see an issue?..
AkBunny907 18
This may be a sign that you guys need to talk, and that you should actually start having sex on a regular basis.
Squid2016 2
that's when you know things have gotten stale
Badkarma4u 17
Dude that's awesome. I hope YDI. Cute creative and sexy. So now everytine you look at your calendar you're going to think about going balls deep in the little woman and just leave the nuts hanging out.
ThrottleJockey 36
My wife and I often do the same due to our different work schedules. During the day we'll do a little sexting so by the time of our scheduled "meeting" we're both aching to rip each other's clothes off!
LadyLuck93 20
Well be grateful that she's not having an affair. Clearly she wants things to get spiced up. Talk to her & settle this situation out, its better to fix things now than later, op.