Today, my wife sent me a Google Calendar reminder for "sex". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife checked the time while we were having sex. Twice. FML
Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML
Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML
Today, like every other day, my wife doesn't have time for sex because she's too busy on Facebook. Then she bitched me out because "we never have sex anymore." FML
Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML
Today, my wife started checking her email on her Blackberry while we were having sex. FML
Today, my wife is upset at me for having to remind her of her responsibilities. She dropped the ball several times in the past, and she hates that I remind her to prepare for upcoming deadlines. FML
Today, I sent a love message to my wife asking if she was horny. Minutes later, I realized that I sent it to my mother in law. FML
Today, my wife picked up her phone, answered a text, added a few things to her phone's shopping list, and looked at her phone calendar to remind me I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. She did all this whilst my penis was inside her, giving it my best effort as well. Self confidence zero. FML
Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML
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Top comments
pokemyeyes 23
YDI for making her reach the point where she has to schedule herself into your calender and send you reminders.
charlamagnet 9
Be happy your actually having sex OP, Some of us aren't as lucky.
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Comments (69)
qbgroh3 15
At least she is sending it to you, and not someone else.
GeorgiaBea 28
If your wife had to tell you- you're doing it wrong.
ayyy_bro 26
Wow you're wife sucks lol
PinkWalls 12
Baby making is hard and stressful! Hopefully that's the reason and not because your marriage sucks. Good luck with the conceiving!!
spyder21 4
how is this a fml? most guys would be happy about that. you just sound ungrateful.
canadiangirl98 9
She could have just sent you a sext
serslybro 20
Well that's romantic...
_Jake_13 6
How is this an FML?