Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. This is the seventh time in a row that she hasn't moved or made any noises the entire way through. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep during sex. This isn't the first time. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were making out, and about to have sex, when she asked me to "do that thing we did yesterday". We haven't had sex in 6 days. FML
Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today my girlfriend actually moved during sex. I love her, but she's so awful in bed. FML
Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML
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Top comments
kg163401 0
I dub thee corpse ******
yazah 0
Try deflating her and then blowing her back up. :)
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Comments (404)
logcabin69 0
lol 89! Right!
princessjazz 0
Were you a virgin before you had sex with her?? Do you even know what you're doing at all..? Like where to stick your junk..
cherryblossomchi 4
looks like she sucks in bed...that bites, or maybe you should ;)
constantine91 0
awkward. very awkward.
rattusrattus 19
Either you suck, you bore her, or she thinks 'lie back and think of England' is a good sex strategy. Yikes.
jewknowit710 2
maybe phone a friend.. lol
pinkspaceboundro 0
weird, I'd ask her if she is okay?
Semirhage_fml 2
Communication, communication, communication. How do people even get to the point where they have had sex with each other seven consecutive times with one person being entirely unresponsive, and a conversation hasn't happened about it? "Is something wrong? Could I do something you'd enjoy more?"
SkyHiLyfe_808 0
Maybe you two need to try something new to spice things up. it sounds like she's either really bored, or you're just terrible in bed.
rezzel 0
better knock her up so she doesnt break up wit u lol