Today, I went to the doctor. They did a test and said they would email me the results. My girlfriend saw the email that said "The test was positive", and now she thinks I'm cheating on her with someone named Doctor Johnson. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML
Today, my girlfriend tells me she missed her period this month. I felt excited until she said, "I will let you know the results of the paternity test." I was not aware we needed a paternity test. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Then my COVID test came back as positive. FML
Today, I went to see my gynecologist. She was writing my symptoms up in my chart on her computer. After a little while, I noticed that she had a confused look on her face and was reading something instead. When I took a peek at the computer screen, I saw that she was Googling my symptoms. FML
Today, after hearing the doctor saying my girlfriend can never be pregnant, I got a bit too excited. I'm currently on the 5th hour of the silent treatment. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office for a minor cold, and left with a diagnosis of pregnancy. FML
Today, my doctor told me I'm pregnant. Since we've been trying for several years, I called my husband to tell him the good news. Not long after, my doctor called to inform me there'd been a clerical mix-up and I'm not actually pregnant after all. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I saw his newly updated Facebook status, which read, "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML
Today, I was checking out my boyfriend's facebook profile. I saw that he had just taken the "How long will it take for your girldriend to realize you're cheating on her?" Quiz. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office after getting a positive pregnancy test. She did another one to confirm the result, which came back negative. My husband is wandering around with a great big smile on his face, because he isn't going to "have a rugrat." FML
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Top comments
SmittyJA24 26
WHY does your GF have access to your email? Control issues? My wife doesn't dig into my email / Facebook / phone calls / etc & I don't look at her stuff.
jonny201 11
Just tell her the truth, if she cares enough she will understand
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Comments (40)
totallynotemily 25
What were you being tested for?
DennisS852 12
hopefully not hiv
Vintage_Cola 29
Ebola.
kpoakes 20
Crazygirlfriend-itis
SmittyJA24 26
WHY does your GF have access to your email? Control issues? My wife doesn't dig into my email / Facebook / phone calls / etc & I don't look at her stuff.
pussy_crusher 7
My fiancé uses my laptop when he can't find his and will sometimes see the emails when the notifications pop up. Probably not the same situation though, as he would never assume I was cheating because of an email!
never_three 21
Maybe she was sitting near him when he got the email. Sometimes that happens.
Ayasha_fml 12
If you really have nothing to hide, then there should be no problem.
garc1795 8
#29 Thats the most lame excuse ever. If the girl didn't have trust issues, she wouldn't have to or need to check anything, its just childish.
ACCOUNTKILLER 18
If you've done nothing wrong, you've earned your right to privacy
ElizaWy 25
#2 - My husband keeps TRYING to give me access to his email and various passwords. I keep shrugging and going "okaaaay", then not bothering to remember them. I guess some people think lack of privacy = closeness...?
missymaster 16
I have access to all of my husband's accounts and he has access to mine. We also don't go digging through one another's shit. It's called trust.
zman938 8
Then there should be no problem? There was nothing to hide and look what happened...
socialproduct 19
#42, if your husband wants to share his personal info with you then I say let him. Maybe for him full disclosure does = closeness. Better than the alternative of him going out of his way to hide everything.
Thwingedkitty 5
My husband can read my email and I can read his. That's called being spouses and parents and not having time for silly privacy complexes when you are trying to organize multiple schedules.
FlutterLoud 29
I love reading some of the texts my BF gets (spam because his number used to be his moms who signed up for everything lol) and he looks at my phone. Neither of us have anything to hide so it doesn't matter.
dreadseeker313 6
Thats the dumbest thing I've ever read
ACCOUNTKILLER 18
I know my partners passwords but never go looking too.
wysegirl 24
My husband and I have access to everything of each others. The difference is do we really care to view the others privacy unless asked or need something from the others accounts.
jonny201 11
Just tell her the truth, if she cares enough she will understand
gabechriswill 19
Your girlfriend seems just a little crazy- Assuming you haven't cheated before. My initial thought would be that it is a message from an actual doctor concerning real issues- not that you are cheating with a doctor. Just explain the situation OP
nash1991 20
This seems like a pretty simple misunderstanding to explain.
thearronaut 10
maybe i'm missing something, but "The test was positive" doesn't exactly scream sexytimes to me.
oomph_fml 25
I think she interpreted "the test was positive" as a pregnancy test which is why she's assumed cheating now.
nanner6206 24
ohhhh, right...I get it now. thank you and fml, I always need interpreters
poorsouls27 7
Or it could be HIV, One of them had to be cheating for him/her to be HIV positive.
19990231 29
Im guessing the gf thought the doctor Johnson had a positive pregnancy test?
fazzems 21
I doubt this would be the subject line, and if she really did read your whole email, then I doubt a doctor would be so vague as to simply say "the results are positive" and not be specific as to what test results.
RememberSchlitz 9
That there is a company called Doc Johnson that makes and sells sex toys doesn't help your case.
gingerlover01 24
get a new girlfriend dude that ones not all there, seriously I had a friend whose girlfriend plotted to kill me because I patted him on the head
19990231 29
These situations are a bit different...