Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, as my dad and I were leaving a store, a man asked us if we could donate to an Alzheimer's fund. My dad hates being asked for money, and so he immediately hunched over and acted like a dirty, senile old man all the way to the car. FML

#20113923
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17855) - you deserved it (1719)

On 10/12/2012 at 6:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I discovered that it's an hour and 45 minutes quicker to get the bus to work, rather than the train. I've worked there for six years. FML

#20036934
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17853) - you deserved it (12117)

On 08/23/2012 at 2:15am - work - by ihatemondays - United Kingdom

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
518 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17851) - you deserved it (128228)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called it down. It came running down the stairs. With a used condom in its mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. It put it directly in my mom's hands. FML

#6356025
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17848) - you deserved it (7472)

On 11/18/2009 at 4:35pm - intimacy - by Tucker (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, as I couldn't get the airplane seat buckle to buckle, I faced the fact that I've been in denial about how fat I have become. The people in my row faced it too as I began to sob uncontrollably. FML

#15240526
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17845) - you deserved it (32041)

On 03/08/2011 at 1:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to walk home from school in the rain, because my mom "didn't have a car to pick me up in". But when I got home, the car had magically appeared. Just great. FML

#2319
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17840) - you deserved it (1863)

On 01/23/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by blahmina - United States (California)

Today, there is an annular solar eclipse. As I was buying the last pair of solar glasses to watch the eclipse with, some jerk snatched them out of my hands and bolted off with them. I now have to make the decision between watching the eclipse and not going blind. FML

#19653342
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17840) - you deserved it (2776)

On 05/20/2012 at 7:35pm - misc - by VocalizedBoar - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I still can't find a job to support myself. The only experience I have is a month in retail and a summer spent in a kitchen de-pooping shrimp. FML

#19333832
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17838) - you deserved it (3487)

On 03/23/2012 at 5:46pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, as I was walking home from work, I became the victim of a drive-by peanutting. Yes, apparently I'm only worth a bag of nuts. FML

#19341181
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17837) - you deserved it (2194)

On 03/24/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I posted a Facebook status on how I hated the new Batman movie. I'm now single, and have received multiple threats. FML

#20009878
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17835) - you deserved it (40910)

On 08/08/2012 at 4:39pm - misc - by Deaththreat101 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was watching TV with my grandma. I said aloud, "Dang, that actor is hot." My grandma pointed out he was a spitting image of my cousin. I realized she was right, and that I may as well be attracted to my own cousin. FML

#20072880
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17833) - you deserved it (3230)

On 09/15/2012 at 12:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was told that I look like a cross between Roger Federer and Neil Patrick Harris. Apparently I have a big forehead and a squished face. FML

#13762185
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17831) - you deserved it (2833)

On 11/08/2010 at 5:32am - misc - by facingit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, someone I used to know got in touch with me, after I hadn't heard from him in years. He insisted that we met up as soon as possible, and wanted me to go to his house that afternoon. I spent the afternoon repairing his computer. Since then, no news. FML

#617
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17829) - you deserved it (2269)

On 12/28/2008 at 4:50am - misc - by maxiflouf - Sent from mobile version



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: