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Today, my landlord informed me that from now on, she'd prefer if I paid my rent in cash each month. Apparently, I "look sketchy" and she didn't "ever want to deal with the hassle of a bounced check." FML

#20102772
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18371) - you deserved it (1850)

On 10/05/2012 at 10:56am - money - by sketchball (man) - United States

Today, at a family Seder, (a Jewish service for Passover), my mom served matzah balls during the festive meal. Considering how much I love matzah balls and there aren't many options for me to eat because I'm a vegetarian, I shouted, "I like really big balls!" in front of my entire family. FML

#921004
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18370) - you deserved it (88169)

On 04/12/2009 at 12:27am - intimacy - by anon13 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that the extremely attractive man that works in my building can hear everything I say about him through the paper-thin walls. FML

#19635956
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18369) - you deserved it (7813)

On 05/17/2012 at 6:33am - misc - by kazmatazz (woman) - Oman

Today, while waiting on tables at work, I was carrying a glass of red wine when I lost balance and spilt it everywhere. After cleaning the floor and myself up and after refilling a new glass, I did exactly the same thing again. FML

#15958012
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18362) - you deserved it (25874)

On 04/28/2011 at 12:04am - work - by tryandtryagain (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to call in sick to work because I was experiencing bowel distress. I called my manager's phone directly so no one else would know of my embarrassment. She put me on speakerphone, and I only realized when the juvenile laughter started. FML

#20109013
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18361) - you deserved it (1719)

On 10/09/2012 at 12:07pm - work - by yolo is for shitheads - United States

Today, I finally felt motivated to do some exercise. As I got my weights out, I noticed out of the corner of my eye someone moving about outside my window. I got scared and dropped a weight on my foot. The person outside was my own reflection. FML

#20195266
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18359) - you deserved it (8625)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:10pm - health - by i see fat people (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, just another casual morning. I went to go drop a deuce in the bathroom. Barely being awake I didn't notice my roommates had put glad wrap between the seat and toilet, so i got piss and shit all over me. FML

#2285
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18357) - you deserved it (4369)

On 01/23/2009 at 5:45am - misc - by ohn0es - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend found a take-out menu under my bed. It's probably been there for months. He looked at it and said, "Well, that explains a lot." FML

#20132432
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18356) - you deserved it (4103)

On 10/25/2012 at 5:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I was driving home and stopped at a light. A cute guy in the truck ahead of me waved me forward and told me to roll down my window. It was the first time a cute guy had talked to me in a while so I was pretty excited. He told me to turn my lights on. FML

#7697046
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18354) - you deserved it (8988)

On 01/30/2010 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I'm supposed to start my new job as a Crime Scene Tech. Instead, I managed to electrocute myself with my hairdryer. I'll now have to attempt to explain to them that I really am qualified to safely operate an electrostatic lifting device, and other expensive equipment. FML

#18842553
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18353) - you deserved it (5946)

On 01/18/2012 at 6:15am - work - by Lyn (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my company announced a new name. They also announced new coffee mugs with the name on them. They've not announced raises in over 3 years. FML

#19324778
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18348) - you deserved it (1867)

On 03/22/2012 at 2:17am - work - by glens - United States

Today, I was talking on my mobile and walking into a grocery store saying, quite loudly, "Time heals all wounds!" right as I passed a woman with significant burns covering her face. I guess I was wrong. FML

#989435
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18347) - you deserved it (48686)

On 04/15/2009 at 12:17pm - misc - by Insensitive (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I texted my crush that I can't come over and invited him over instead. I was so anxious for his reply I took my cell to the washroom with me. Just as I was pulling up my pants I heard something fall into the bowl, I turned around and watched my cell floating in the my own pee, vibrating. FML

#1429892
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18346) - you deserved it (52720)

On 04/28/2009 at 5:49pm - love - by ugh (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



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