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Today, I took my dog to the vet and she was diagnosed with obesity. The vet then told me that dogs usually imitate their owners eating and behavior habits. FML

#26407
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17131) - you deserved it (22434)

On 02/11/2009 at 5:05pm - animals - by qwertyasdfghzxcv - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got my first tattoo. When I showed my boyfriend, he asked where I got the design. I told him I saw it in a sketch book of his. He designed it for his last girlfriend, who got it in the same place. FML

#5336281
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17127) - you deserved it (53928)

On 09/18/2009 at 6:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it's the last day of finals week. Unfortunately the only test I've passed this week is the pregnancy test I took during my lunch break in a Subway bathroom. FML

#18499980
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17125) - you deserved it (43595)

On 12/13/2011 at 12:16am - health - by LogicalMolly - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was showing my boyfriend some stuff I bought that day: a new thong and a bag of his favorite brand of peanuts. He was more excited about the peanuts. FML

#20053819
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17119) - you deserved it (4258)

On 09/02/2012 at 9:38am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, the roads were OK, so I cleaned the ice and snow off my car so I could go out. I rolled my window down a little bit while I was driving to clear the snow off the base of the window. A chunk of ice flew off my hood, in through the window, and hit my eye. I then hit a snowbank. FML

#8452983
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17118) - you deserved it (4831)

On 02/19/2010 at 7:37pm - misc - by ouch - United States

Today, I was hanging out with the guy I really like. I lifted my arms to put my hair in a ponytail when he noticed a hole that had apparently tore in the armpit of my shirt, so he put his finger through it. I haven't shaved in weeks. FML

#20513075
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17118) - you deserved it (50283)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I took my dog for a walk down by the river. I was throwing sticks for him with one hand and talking on the phone with the other. Then I accidentally threw my phone in the river instead of the stick and was standing there talking to the stick while my phone sat at the bottom of the river. FML

#102926
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17116) - you deserved it (55703)

On 02/22/2009 at 9:52am - animals - by El Boz (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found myself crying for an hour when my recreated crush on The Sims 3 game rejected my character and ran off with someone else. FML

#15978808
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17113) - you deserved it (51434)

On 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm - love - by Nxydolli (man) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today, my boyfriend insisted that we try phone sex. He started telling me all the things he wanted to do to me while breathing heavily. Unfortunately, it sounded so ridiculous, I burst out laughing. He hung up on me, and has refused to pick up since. FML

#18849422
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17113) - you deserved it (30942)

On 01/18/2012 at 11:09pm - intimacy - by Lickmylovepump (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my apartment has been echoing all day with the wails of my cat, Butters. He's yet again managed to trap himself in the umbrella stand. In the past, he has eventually gotten himself out, but this time I think I might have to use a hacksaw. FML

#19684579
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17114) - you deserved it (2722)

On 05/26/2012 at 5:35pm - misc - by Dom - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, during a workplace safety exercise at work, I managed to cut off the tip of my thumb. FML

#19673015
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17098) - you deserved it (3299)

On 05/24/2012 at 2:26pm - work - by thwack - United States

Today, I decided to give things a go with the guy that has fancied me for three years, based purely on my looks. After getting to know my personality he has decided he no longer fancies me at all. FML

#2272
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17094) - you deserved it (6562)

On 01/23/2009 at 1:41am - love - by twat - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I got my sister to pluck my eyebrows. She shaped them wrong, so now I look constantly sad. FML

#11849273
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17085) - you deserved it (25907)

On 07/13/2010 at 11:02am - misc - by OhNo - United Kingdom (Sheffield)



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