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Today, as I sat down for my flight, I realised that the passenger I had to sit next to for the next seven hours was wearing a necklace made from tampon packaging. FML

#19995117
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23324) - you deserved it (1846)

On 07/31/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by lotd - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why it would be highly offensive and inappropriate for him to go as Caylee Anthony for Halloween. I think he's still planning on doing it. FML

#18030465
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23320) - you deserved it (4464)

On 10/20/2011 at 10:32am - love - by Miroslav208 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML

#19374662
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23320) - you deserved it (2465)

On 03/30/2012 at 3:45am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, during a blowjob, my girlfriend decided to try something new by squeezing my balls as hard as she could as I came, for a "more intense orgasm". All she gave me was a ruptured testicle. FML

#21448216
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23322) - you deserved it (1850)

On 07/27/2015 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I went out for pizza with my boyfriend. He loaned me his debit card and loudly announced in front of everyone that his pin code was the numerical equivalent of "Fart", and repeated it twice, just in case I hadn't heard. FML

#14969224
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23321) - you deserved it (3503)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:14am - misc - by datingamoron (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as I was riding the bus, a lady told her daughter to sit next to me. She looked at me and started to scream and cry in horror. FML

#19357176
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23319) - you deserved it (2634)

On 03/27/2012 at 12:32pm - misc - by AmihayG - Israel

Today, I found out I wasn't invited to my neighbor's funeral, with whom I had been good friends with for a long time. When I asked her husband why, he said, "We have a small amount of money and can't afford for you to eat all of the refreshments." FML

#21424589
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23317) - you deserved it (2867)

On 06/11/2015 at 5:04pm - health - by DUFF - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that the only reason my guy friends actually hang out with me at my house all the time is because they think my mom is hot. FML

#19994293
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23312) - you deserved it (2155)

On 07/31/2012 at 10:21am - misc - by loser (man) - United States

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend. Things got a little hot and I started to pull up my shirt. She screamed and told me to stop because the innocence of her stuffed animals was at stake. We are 18, and she was dead serious. FML

#6933705
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23311) - you deserved it (3592)

On 12/25/2009 at 2:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I hit a parked car. It happened to be my driving instructor's car. While he was instructing me, sitting in the passenger seat. I don't think I'll pass. FML

#6497177
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23310) - you deserved it (13271)

On 11/28/2009 at 4:37pm - misc - by badDriver (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got a call from my cable company in regards to a bill I didn't pay. I paid the bill two weeks ago in full, but they never told me the account changed when my name was put on the account. So now I owe $170 more, and my ex-roommate is getting a $140 refund in the mail. FML

#21430451
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23311) - you deserved it (1976)

On 06/23/2015 at 12:15am - money - by broke bitch - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was out on a date with a guy. I leaned down to get something out of my bag and hit my head on some protruding concrete. I said I was fine. Then blood came running down my face. FML

#8525883
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23308) - you deserved it (2575)

On 02/21/2010 at 7:31pm - misc - by erin1985 (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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