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Today, one of my work colleagues was staring at my severe sunburn. She wanted to know if she could "peel" me, when my sunburn becomes "ripe", because she loves the sound. She won't take no for an answer, and I work with her everyday this week. FML

#20194217
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23352) - you deserved it (1766)

On 12/06/2012 at 7:19pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that my boss of 2 years not only doesn't know my name, but calls me "Jew hair" behind my back because of my natural ringlets. This man determines all of my career progression. FML

#21423649
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23352) - you deserved it (1534)

On 06/09/2015 at 11:21pm - work - by hmdge1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Doncaster)

Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML

#20831608
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23349) - you deserved it (60924)

On 08/11/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to work only to serve one table, make a $9.00 tip, get sent home because it was slow, have the city busses stop running because of weather, and have to pay a $20 cab fare to get home. FML

#1047
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23347) - you deserved it (1495)

On 01/13/2009 at 3:54pm - love - by ren - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I used a public bathroom and set my motorcycle helmet on the sink while I used the urinal. The helmet rolled into the sink, under the faucet and set off the motion detector, soaking the inside. I drove 15 miles home in 30 degree weather with a wet helmet. FML

#7351038
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23348) - you deserved it (8719)

On 01/15/2010 at 12:04am - misc - by RyanSmithN (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

#8125309
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23348) - you deserved it (7260)

On 02/11/2010 at 8:33am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was driving with my boss and she held her breath as we drove past a cell tower, because she didn't want to "breathe in any radiation." I have to take orders from this moron. FML

#20060271
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23347) - you deserved it (1657)

On 09/06/2012 at 9:45am - work - by Heavy D - United States

Today, I returned from vacation. Because of rain, I spent 3 days sitting in a hotel room, watching a TV with bad reception. I'm now less relaxed that if I'd have just stayed home, because that wouldn't have cost me $500, and my TV has more than 15 channels. So much for my first vacation in 5 years. FML

#13584749
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23347) - you deserved it (4682)

On 10/25/2010 at 12:22am - misc - by not_relaxed (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad taught me how to swim. I had to keep doing a lot of strange movements to keep my body floating. While doing that, two 8-year-old girls came and asked me if i needed help getting out of the water. I'm a 20 year old guy. FML

#17582783
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23346) - you deserved it (7922)

On 08/26/2011 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I asked my best friend if he would do me the honour of becoming my son's godfather. He replied, "Um, that's just rude. You know I'm an atheist." Huh? FML

#19989164
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23346) - you deserved it (7789)

On 07/28/2012 at 2:29pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML

#19388939
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23342) - you deserved it (9530)

On 04/01/2012 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States

Today, I was scheduled for an interview at a local firm owned by two partners. The secretary told me to be there at around 12:00 to 12:30 pm, so I arrived at 12:15. The first boss told me off for being early, the other one yelled at me for being late. FML

#20084697
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23341) - you deserved it (2295)

On 09/23/2012 at 5:23am - work - by whatisthisidonteven (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, my grandmother ripped her pants. We all got a big view of her pink thong. FML

#21430623
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23343) - you deserved it (1913)

On 06/23/2015 at 11:57am - misc - by cAPITOLpORN - United Kingdom (Havering)



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