Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while parallel parked, a car stopped next to me, backed up, and hit the woman behind him. When she pulled off to the side to check for damage, she slammed into me. FML

#14543441
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20437) - you deserved it (1615)

On 01/11/2011 at 8:34am - misc - by raiyne -

Today, I frantically chased a customer down the parking lot, because they had left their package at my register. Only to find out that the whole time I was chasing the wrong person. FML

#17678735
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20437) - you deserved it (3956)

On 09/06/2011 at 5:32am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got jumped by five dudes who took my phone. On it I had naked pictures of myself. An hour later they sent the pictures to all of my contacts. FML

#5113950
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (42305)

On 09/07/2009 at 8:52pm - misc - by c-mack (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my roommate came out of the bathroom, and asked me how the scales knew her weight in both pounds and kilos, even though "the exchange rate is always changing." I actually live with this idiot. FML

Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML

#20074336
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20427) - you deserved it (3518)

On 09/16/2012 at 9:46am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went on a date with a cute guy. After picking me up, he started to play on repeat, and sing to me, 'Happy Together' by The Turtles. For the entire 20 minute ride. FML

#8195721
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20425) - you deserved it (3217)

On 02/13/2010 at 3:49am - love - by girlie5445 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend told me that because he works fifty hours a week, I should be meeting an arbitrary quota of fifty hours of housework, and if I don't, I'm insensitive and ungrateful. FML

#19895787
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20423) - you deserved it (9198)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:34pm - work - by lazy pregnant girl - United States

Today, while at a store, my stuttering problem became so bad the poor store clerk had to supply my own words for me. FML

#19397276
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20422) - you deserved it (1620)

On 04/02/2012 at 8:32pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after 5 months of unemployment and hardcore job searching, I got hired for my dream job. I called my mum to tell her all about it, to which she responded, "Great honey! Now all you need to do is lose all that weight". She allowed me all of 4 minutes of feeling good about myself. FML

#19676513
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20424) - you deserved it (2541)

On 05/25/2012 at 12:32am - misc - by daddyowl - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was watching TV with my mom, when a plumbing ad came on. A hot guy showed up on-screen and said "I'm here to snake your drain." My mom immediately piped up with, "Oh, I'd let him snake my drain any day." Thanks for that imagery, mom. FML

#20101823
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20422) - you deserved it (2671)

On 10/04/2012 at 7:24pm - misc - by disgusted (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while I was on my laptop, I decided to take a nap. Little did I know that my leg was covering up the cool air intake underneath the machine. I woke up an hour later with a first degree burn on my thigh. From a laptop. FML

#2080741
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20421) - you deserved it (40729)

On 05/19/2009 at 2:49pm - misc - by laptopsRus (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML

#19173617
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20421) - you deserved it (2856)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, two girls came up to me on the street and asked if they could take a photo with me for their high school scavenger hunt, because they needed a picture with a stranger. One of the girls shook her head and said to the other, "It needs to be an attractive stranger" and walked away. FML

#20118386
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20419) - you deserved it (1356)

On 10/15/2012 at 6:09pm - misc - by notattractiveatall (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: