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Today, my boyfriend decided to take me out bowling. My mom was going to take us. My parents ended up bowling with us. I had a double date with my parents. FML

#8283424
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23914) - you deserved it (5640)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:14am - love - by shininghayley (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was called into my son's school because he had got into a fist-fight with another pupil and I had to take him home. He clammed up about the reason behind the fight, until I finally managed to coax it out of him: the other kid is in "Hufflepuff" and he's in "Ravenclaw." FML

#20070089
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23914) - you deserved it (3898)

On 09/13/2012 at 10:31am - kids - by PissOffPottermore (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a furniture store. We split up for a bit, and after a while I went to find him. A salesman noticed I seemed to be looking around for him and said, "Oh, your son is upstairs." We're the same age. FML

#20155909
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23914) - you deserved it (2043)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:26am - misc - by slypher25aussie (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got home to find our house broken into. Among other things, the thieves took our television, my laptop and several pieces of expensive jewelry. Also missing was my daughter's My Little Pony collection. I think we were robbed by a Brony. FML

#19450814
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23909) - you deserved it (1880)

On 04/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was drinking coffee out of my favorite mug, when it slipped out of my hand. I caught it, but not before most of the hot coffee spilled all over my lap. In reaction, I dropped the mug again, shattering it. FML

#13802701
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23908) - you deserved it (3910)

On 11/11/2010 at 12:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a wild squirrel managed to get into my house. I can't see him but I hear him in the walls. FML

#8712644
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23907) - you deserved it (2198)

On 02/28/2010 at 6:16am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I wanted to take a bubble bath with the jets in the bath that I haven't used in years. When I got in, it took me a while to realize that the jets had squirted out slime and a family of unidentifiable bugs that have probably been living there for years. FML

#20060052
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23908) - you deserved it (8672)

On 09/06/2012 at 2:38am - misc - by juliannamelissa - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I caught my finger in a sliding door. It made me pass out and give myself a concussion. My genetics would rather slam my face into the floor than deal with a pinched finger. FML

#15273701
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23905) - you deserved it (4442)

On 03/11/2011 at 9:11am - health - by Pain_intolerant - Canada

Today, I found a guy getting out of my car with my GPS. He started running and I chased him. We eventually reached a dead end and he gave it back to me. I took it back from him and said, "Sorry..." FML

#3430
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23905) - you deserved it (5812)

On 01/29/2009 at 4:34pm - misc - by FailBear - United States (California)

Today, I finally had the opportunity to have sex with my girlfriend. This would be the first time for both of us, so I tried to make it really special. I had everything planned out to be very romantic. She loved how it was set up. After all this, I couldn't get it up at all, all night. FML

#6116974
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23903) - you deserved it (4617)

On 11/02/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized that my parents never ground me as a punishment because I don't get out enough for it to matter. FML

#13676187
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23902) - you deserved it (5386)

On 11/01/2010 at 4:10pm - misc - by evilparents (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, not only did my boyfriend set my hair on fire, but he attempted to put it out by dumping bong water on my head. FML

#19631611
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23902) - you deserved it (9462)

On 05/16/2012 at 10:19am - love - by Coykoi - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I bought a new Ipod to replace my old one which decided to stop working. After purchasing my new nano Ipod, I decided to bang my old Ipod on the desk very hard because it was useless. It started working again. FML

#13221595
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23898) - you deserved it (8661)

On 09/27/2010 at 11:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)



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