Choose the period

Choose a category

Today, it was wacky tacky day at my school. I did not participate, however, I did get voted the tackiest outfit in my school. FML

by obsceene / 10/18/2010 at 6:49am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, a woman fainted, and an extremely attractive cop came in to help. I ended up running into him an hour later. Seeing as though I'm not very shy or a nervous person, I struck up a conversation with him, thinking it must be fate. I ended up fumbling my words so much he asked if I was drunk. FML

by Anonymous / 11/06/2010 at 12:40am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I went to dinner with an amazing guy. At the end he said he had to go to the washroom. 15 min later he was still MIA, so I figured he'd ditched me with the bill. I paid and left. 10 min later he texted me, asking where I was. Turns out he hadn't ditched me. He was having "stomach issues." FML

by oops / 07/29/2012 at 8:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my new boyfriend came over to my apartment for the first time. Up until now I thought he was great, but when he spotted the book I'm currently reading next to my couch, he uttered the immortal question, "Why do you read?" FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2012 at 1:18am / United States (New Mexico) / Love

Today, I decided to to gather up the courage to ask the cute boy in my math class for his number. He gave it to me, and I texted him later that night. But little did I know he actually gave me the number of the creep in class who is always grabbing my ass. I ended up asking the creep out. FML

by thisiswhyimsingle / 09/14/2015 at 1:17am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I used a public restroom. I saw my sister's shoes walk into the stall next to me, so I gave her a little nudge with my foot. We then nudged each other until I walked out and saw a homeless man with the same shoes as my sister. He then tried to hold my hand. FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 12:56am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I needed a change of clothes, so I called my mom. She brought me a grey shirt with a toucan on the front and Mexico City spelled in glitter. I asked her why she would bring me such an ugly shirt, and she started crying. Turns out she bought it for me as a present from her trip. FML

by awwimanahole / 07/04/2013 at 1:07am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends decided to throw a going away party because I'm moving. It would have been great if I had actually been invited. FML

by rcarn / 06/12/2015 at 10:25am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard on the news that the average debt one is in when they graduate college is $24,000. I've been in college for one year and my debt is already $20,000. And it turns out that my school's accreditation does not exist like I was told. $20,000 in debt and no college credits to show for it. FML

by krissysays / 10/24/2010 at 10:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Instead of having breakup sex, she tidied my room. She said it gave her more pleasure than any time we'd ever had sex. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2010 at 8:09am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was sitting on the train wondering what that putrid smell was. As I got off the train I realized there was vomit all over the back of my seat. FML

by kstaa / 02/10/2010 at 6:47am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, I went to a wine tasting for the first time. I copied the experienced people around me by swishing the wine around in my mouth, which I then choked on and spit out all over my white blouse. FML

by rookiemistake / 04/26/2015 at 11:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML

by Username / 02/22/2010 at 12:44am / United States / Health