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Today, I was walking in the shoes I'm going to wear for a wedding and fell, spraining my ankle. I'm the Matron of Honor and I can barely walk. The wedding is in three days. FML

Today, I found out my husband has been talking to another woman on Facebook. His only defense was "I thought I deleted the messages." FML

#20051914
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25109) - you deserved it (2765)

On 09/01/2012 at 2:02am - love - by gmac0417 - United States

Today, I had the most rancid fart. My dog woke up from his nap and bit me as punishment. FML

#21412078
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25109) - you deserved it (7105)

On 05/18/2015 at 4:40pm - misc - by Swabidizop - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was given a new responsibility at the law firm where I work. I'm now in charge of punching holes in every single piece of paper to be found in the office, estimated to be in the hundred-thousands. The reason? I finish my daily clerical work too quickly. FML

#21372587
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25106) - you deserved it (2157)

On 03/11/2015 at 4:15pm - work - by KillMePlease (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I came across a picture of my grandpa taking a hit off a bong, while wearing nothing but a Playboy shirt. FML

#18756866
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25105) - you deserved it (3919)

On 01/09/2012 at 1:53pm - misc - by mortifiedgrandchild - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML

#19637548
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25105) - you deserved it (1920)

On 05/17/2012 at 4:41pm - misc - by Unhappymothersday - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at a restaurant, I was joking around trying to make my friend laugh by pretending to be a ninja. I did this by putting my napkin in front of my face. I happened to look over at another table and saw that a lady wearing a burqa was giving me the most evil glare I have ever seen in my life. FML

#12768878
48 comments

Today, I woke up to a pile of hair on my floor. I looked in the mirror and realized the hair was from my head. I had a dream about cutting my hair and I guess it came true. FML

#14721795
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25104) - you deserved it (3165)

On 01/26/2011 at 4:49pm - misc - by Larz (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my best friend told me he masturbates to my Instagram page. Thanks, I guess. FML

#21442921
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25112) - you deserved it (3270)

On 07/17/2015 at 7:00am - intimacy - by battle1 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some guy picking up $300. FML

#8750988
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25101) - you deserved it (6414)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:55pm - money - by sdauner - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I picked off what I thought was a small bug feeding on my skin. I was wrong. It was a mole. I spent the last 30 minutes trying to stop the continuous bleeding. FML

#17514634
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25101) - you deserved it (10088)

On 08/18/2011 at 11:22pm - health - by c.hip - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend in his room, wearing his boxers. He told me this story about how one time he had diarrhea when he was stuck in traffic and had not choice but to poop himself. I asked him what prompted this story. He said I was wearing the boxers he pooped in. FML

#5669435
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (4684)

On 10/05/2009 at 8:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I picked up my car from the repair shop, drove two miles, and ran out of gas. I then walked to get gas, put a gallon of gas in the car, and tried to start it. The battery was too weak to start the car, and died on the spot. FML

#19896001
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (2434)

On 07/05/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by 303 - United States (Texas)



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