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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was feeling hungry, so I went to the kitchen to get a bowl of cereal. I found hundreds of weevils festering in my Lucky Charms. FML

#7937291
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23207) - you deserved it (3918)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by annony-moose - Sent from mobile version

Today, while in my drama class, my character in a play has to quickly jump up out from his desk. Somehow, my shirt got caught on the desk, ripping it almost completely off in front of a live audience. FML

#13810188
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23207) - you deserved it (2752)

On 11/12/2010 at 12:41am - misc - by me - United States

Today, I was severely chewed out by my boss because, according to him, I look down on him too often. I'm 6ft5. FML

#20162604
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23203) - you deserved it (1571) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/13/2012 at 4:23pm - work - by makiju - Sent from mobile version

Today, I playfully nudged my friend on the shoulder. She countered by shoving me head-first into a trash can. FML

#16077994
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23199) - you deserved it (9416)

On 05/07/2011 at 12:26pm - misc - by Cheerieful - United States

Today, while working security at a welfare office, I had to listen as a claimant gushed about her upcoming Caribbean cruise. I work two jobs and haven't had a vacation since 2006. FML

#20092291
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23200) - you deserved it (1635)

On 09/28/2012 at 1:40pm - work - by getajob (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went grocery shopping. As I was leaning in to pick up some produce, someone viciously slapped me on the butt. I whirled around and nobody was anywhere in sight. Now I'm starting to worry that I'm losing my mind. FML

#19517929
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23198) - you deserved it (2528)

On 04/23/2012 at 6:41pm - misc - by beleria (woman) - United States

Today, I went out for pizza with my boyfriend. He loaned me his debit card and loudly announced in front of everyone that his pin code was the numerical equivalent of "Fart", and repeated it twice, just in case I hadn't heard. FML

#14969224
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23197) - you deserved it (3493)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:14am - misc - by datingamoron (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my best friend if he would do me the honour of becoming my son's godfather. He replied, "Um, that's just rude. You know I'm an atheist." Huh? FML

#19989164
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23197) - you deserved it (7760)

On 07/28/2012 at 2:29pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my ex girlfriend that I still love sent me a text, quote "I still love you, but i'm not IN love with you" um. what? FML

#779
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23195) - you deserved it (3043)

On 01/07/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by wtf - United States (Michigan)

Today, I after getting off the bus, I realized that the man I was talking to was distracting me so his "buddy" could steal my wallet. FML

#14573831
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23196) - you deserved it (3354)

On 01/14/2011 at 1:32am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my best friend's mom doesn't wear pyjamas when I got up to go get a glass of water in the middle of the night, at the same time she did. FML

#13204621
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23194) - you deserved it (3002)

On 09/26/2010 at 1:45am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I brought a cupcake to school for my friend's birthday. After taking one bite, she exclaimed that it was the worst thing she had ever tasted and that we should sue the store that I bought it from. I baked it myself. FML

#14113537
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23194) - you deserved it (4807)

On 12/06/2010 at 10:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML

#20022524
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23192) - you deserved it (7893)

On 08/15/2012 at 12:46pm - love - by lonely. (man) - United States (New York)



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