Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my sister-in-law was diagnosed with breast cancer. My mother then confided in me that she suspected it was a prank to get more money from our family. FML

#20125135
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20582) - you deserved it (1357)

On 10/20/2012 at 11:10am - misc - by iamsolid - United States

Today, I was in class and noticed that it smelled strongly of cat urine. I smelled my shoulder and realized that my cat had peed on my sweater. I had six hours of classes left, and the smell had permeated my shirt. FML

#8094791
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20578) - you deserved it (5320)

On 02/10/2010 at 4:19pm - animals - by snickerdoodles (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20577) - you deserved it (2379)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

#19004597
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20574) - you deserved it (5680)

On 02/05/2012 at 9:14pm - health - by MahSquito (man) - United States

Today, I accidentally downloaded a virus, which hijacked my email program. I somehow doubt the Dean at my university will thank me for my suggestion that he too could experience 100% natural male enhancement pills. FML

#8874142
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20570) - you deserved it (5283)

On 03/06/2010 at 5:44pm - misc - by smarie09 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I kissed a boy for the first time in over a year. It was at drama club practice, and he quickly ended up asking the director if we could remove that scene from the play. FML

#20114767
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20568) - you deserved it (2243)

On 10/13/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by pinkfreak94 - United States (Ohio)

Today, a patient at the hospital I work at had a tracheal tube and couldn't speak. I'm unable to read lips, but I'm pretty sure he was mouthing the words 'stupid bitch' every time I tried to stop him from pulling out his IV. FML

#14642325
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20567) - you deserved it (2268)

On 01/19/2011 at 7:52pm - work - by sirenmario -

Today, I noticed we had gotten new colored toothpicks at the restaurant I work at. That was the highlight of my day. Apparently my life has gotten so boring I get excited over colored toothpicks. FML

#18458451
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20567) - you deserved it (4029)

On 12/08/2011 at 2:30am - work - by dulllife - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure. The pedicurist began examining my feet, then called his coworkers over to demonstrate how to deal with "excessively crusty" feet. FML

#20407705
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20567) - you deserved it (16281)

On 12/19/2012 at 3:53pm - health - by Crusty -

Today, I decided to talk to a girl at the gym I had seen there a lot. I walked up to her at the station she was at and asked her out to dinner sometime. I didn't realize she had been wearing headphones. She took them off and asked if I was waiting on the station. My courage left. I said yes. FML

#20198068
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20565) - you deserved it (4107)

On 12/09/2012 at 6:34pm - health - by Aaron - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized that I hadn't seen my video camera in a while. After searching for several minutes in my room, I remembered that I had given it to my dad to hide before our month long trip (so even if someone broke into the house the video camera would be safe). He's forgotten where he hid it. FML

#12715799
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20563) - you deserved it (8450)

On 08/24/2010 at 3:25am - misc - by lostvideo - Israel (Yerushalayim)

Today, I was waiting at an intersection. Across from me, a car was approaching and a bunny ran out. Trying to save it, I flashed my lights and beeped at the car crazily, when the bunny turned around. The lights turned, and as I drove forward the bunny came back out and I hit it. FML

#6346193
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20562) - you deserved it (6532)

On 11/17/2009 at 8:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while at an important meeting at work, I got to watch helplessly as a police officer gave me a parking meter ticket. Added to that my boss chewed me out for "never paying attention and staring out the window during meetings". FML

#15756717
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20561) - you deserved it (9956)

On 04/12/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by Kevin -



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: