Health, Gross and Scams: Alternative

Alternative

By never date activists - 24/10/2023 02:00

Today, my girlfriend has such a bad ear infection that she's leaking yellow pus, but she still refuses antibiotics, calling them "white man's poison" and insisting that "indigenous healing" will cure her. This translates to listening to drum music and dancing, then vomiting everywhere because her balance is fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 796

You deserved it 165

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Blockages

By jakestorm - 04/09/2019 20:00

Today, my girlfriend texted me to pick her up some medicine because she’s "all plugged up." When I arrived with laxatives, she yelled at me. She meant her sinuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 692

You deserved it 373

Wow thanks, I'm cured

By anon - 13/06/2023 03:00

Today, my girlfriend complained that she always feels like shit, and that she's tried "everything" to feel better. Everything except eating regular healthy meals, exercising, sleeping regularly, drinking water, showering, and changing clothes daily, that is. I pointed this out, and she kicked me out in a rage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 868

You deserved it 287

Love in the time of Covid

By moving out now - 27/09/2023 14:00

Today, my germophobic girlfriend has tested positive for Covid, and is utterly convinced she's going to die. She's been crying in the bed for the last five hours, talking about how much she regrets her choices, and how she never should have spent her last year with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 104

Cristal mommies

By Anonymous - 12/10/2022 23:00 - United Kingdom - Barking

Today, my girlfriend kicked me out for the night so she could calm down. All I did was suggest her headache might improve with paracetamol and a nap, as opposed to the burning sage stinking up our bedroom and the crystal wand she had pressed against her eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 376

You deserved it 196

By Damn.... - 28/01/2011 19:26 - United States

Today, I was given the ultimate ultimatum: either I suffer excruciating stomach pains and remain a hostage to the porcelain whirlpool goddess, or I stop taking pain medication and face the wrath of a raging infection in my jaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 842

You deserved it 3 122

Sludge factory

By fmyactuallife - 03/05/2020 08:00

Today, I'm on my second day of a week of antibiotics to treat a bad urine infection. Incidentally, the pills seem to be giving me extremely loud, frequent, gut-wrenchingly painful and smelly diarrhea. Only 5 more days to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 620

You deserved it 127

By Anonymous - 09/01/2014 19:02 - United States - Converse

Today, like every day since my wife was prescribed antibiotics for an infection, I had to hide one of the pills inside her food, because she'd apparently rather fall seriously ill than swallow them like an adult. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 776

You deserved it 4 532

My body, my choice

By Anonymous - 16/09/2020 15:01 - Canada - Red Deer

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to drink several shots of vodka after taking a pill that makes you sick when you drink. She puked all night and then blamed me for making her sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 379

You deserved it 148

By daddy-o - 14/03/2012 07:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 790

You deserved it 20 837

By Anonymous - 17/11/2012 00:30 - Croatia - Rijeka

Today, I have a tooth infection that's spread to my jaw and ear. It hurts so badly that I'm practically in tears. Today's also the day I found out I'm allergic to the medication I was prescribed. Everything hurts, I'm covered in hives, and I can't stop throwing up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 200

You deserved it 2 164

FluffythePink 19

Tuesday 24 October 2023 4:21

Eh, if she's that set on her own Darwin Award there's not a lot you can do except hope she survives the sepsis. Personally I'd be rethinking the relationship though, do you seriously want to spend your life with someone this ******* stupid?

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 24 October 2023 4:06

Some idiocy cannot be helped. It’s sad…

Comments

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 24 October 2023 4:06

Some idiocy cannot be helped. It’s sad…

FluffythePink 19

Tuesday 24 October 2023 4:21

UsernameNotRandom 10

Tuesday 24 October 2023 10:39

It will be the same for a stroke, a heart attack, and cancer. If she refuses proper medical help she is selfish and a liability on your emotions. As much as you care for her now, what if it was something worse and you watch her slowly die because she refuses proper care. It isn't worth the heartache. Find someone with common sense and who cares about being around for YOU. Save yourself OP.