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Today, I was at the water park, when I slipped and fell to the ground in front of the no running sign. I was walking. FML

#16713536
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25422) - you deserved it (4708)

On 06/17/2011 at 3:15pm - misc - by NoRunning - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was in the theatre watching a movie. I leaned my head back to relax. Suddenly, I hear this sneeze behind me and then I feel "rain" pouring down on my face. FML

#8350664
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25417) - you deserved it (2415)

On 02/16/2010 at 8:30pm - misc - by misspriss (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

#21073315
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25416) - you deserved it (55848)

On 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm - misc - by well SHIT (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my boyfriend cheated on me with his boss so he could get a promotion and "provide" for us. This from the guy who made me quit my job because he said he made enough money to support us both. FML

#21438957
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25420) - you deserved it (3232)

On 07/09/2015 at 9:42am - love - by dtack2tack - United States

Today, we surprised my grandpa by being at his house when he arrived. We haven't seen him in seven years. He had a small heart attack. It was his birthday. FML

#13612177
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25415) - you deserved it (7277)

On 10/27/2010 at 6:04am - misc - by Sean - United States (Florida)

Today, I am pregnant, sober, designated driver, and puke cleaner. Yay for the New Year! FML

#14418151
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25412) - you deserved it (6879)

On 01/01/2011 at 1:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML

#9721953
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25410) - you deserved it (56413)

On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, while at the beach, my little brother's hat blew off. I chased after it before I completely lost sight and realized I was no match for the wind. I get back and he's wearing the hat. I chased a fucking trash bag for a mile thinking it was his hat. FML

#17729862
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25409) - you deserved it (10209)

On 09/12/2011 at 6:32pm - misc - by justhereforlaughs (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my co-worker handed me a note. The note said, "If you can, please take a shower once in a while." The smell was coming from the broken bathroom next to my office. FML

#18896792
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25409) - you deserved it (2303)

On 01/24/2012 at 3:15am - health - by stinky - United States (Colorado)

Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML

#14842863
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25408) - you deserved it (6407)

On 02/04/2011 at 7:05pm - misc - by nosleep (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I fell asleep with my hands down my pants. I woke up to an excruciating pain coming from my genitalea. It turns out that I was having nightmares and I squeezed my balls because I was so terrified. I popped 3 blood vessels in my scrotum and now walk with a limp. FML

#6635616
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25407) - you deserved it (9924)

On 12/06/2009 at 3:42pm - intimacy - by Ballhugger (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I held hands with a male mannequin in a department store, just to remember what holding hands felt like. FML

#20069351
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25407) - you deserved it (6154)

On 09/12/2012 at 8:26pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a call from a creditor asking for a Sarah. I told them that I'm not Sarah, nor do I know one. They then asked if she was my wife. Annoyed, I said, "Alright, when did I get a wife? I don't even remember having a girlfriend." They sniggered and hung up. FML

#17175800
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25406) - you deserved it (6751)

On 07/19/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by Miriden - United States



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