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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I got my car back from the shop. The engine has been rebuilt twice in the past 3 months. My check engine light just came on. FML

#14574374
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22195) - you deserved it (3008)

On 01/14/2011 at 2:38am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a man in a hurry asked me for a light. Not being able to find my lighter amongst the muddle inside my handbag, I handed him my lit cigarette so he could light his. He took it from me, started smoking it and walked off. FML

#20860218
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22195) - you deserved it (32092) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/30/2013 at 6:59am - misc - by Anonyme (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was on the phone to my boyfriend in England. I live in Australia. What did he talk about for 15 minutes straight? Mafia Wars on Facebook and how far he had got. FML

#7885768
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22193) - you deserved it (4858)

On 02/04/2010 at 8:35pm - love - by MafiaWarsWidow (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I purchased a brand new television. Not long after the professional who hung it on my wall left, it came crashing down on my hardwood floor. I'm now left with a busted TV, a tear in my living room wall, and a severely drained bank account. FML

#20125611
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22191) - you deserved it (2368)

On 10/20/2012 at 6:48pm - money - by fuck gangnam style in the anus - United States (California)

Today, I told my dad that I was going to sleep over my friends house this weekend with a few other guys to play Dungeons and Dragons. He responded with, "Oh, back in my day, me and my pals used to pick on the kids who played Dungeons and Dragons." FML

#2261901
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22190) - you deserved it (53170)

On 05/25/2009 at 12:14am - misc - by ninjawhat1337 (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found a picture my husband had saved on the computer. It was of me, and he had named it "Fatter". FML

#15075025
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22190) - you deserved it (11671)

On 02/22/2011 at 3:38am - love - by just great... -

Today, my husband and I went to our first counseling sessions, where the main focus was communication. When the therapist called us in together to discuss techniques we could use at home, my husband looked around, rolled his eyes, and responded with, "Uh huh" to every question. FML

#19144209
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22188) - you deserved it (3480)

On 02/23/2012 at 2:59am - love - by atsukobo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, working at a daycare centre, when packing up the kids' beds after sleep time, I slipped and landed in a puddle. Of urine. I had no spare pants. I had to wear them for the rest of my shift. FML

#18459141
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22186) - you deserved it (2756)

On 12/08/2011 at 7:40am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was throwing rocks into a pond while our class was on a field trip. The teacher started to pass around an old rare civil war bullet. As the bullet got to me, I threw another rock in the river, only to notice a rock in my hand and the bullet gone. FML

#21062817
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22186) - you deserved it (56528)

On 02/16/2014 at 9:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my kitchen sink was clogged. I poured a bottle of Drano down and came back two hours later. The clog is still there, but the glue on the pipe is not and now there is Drano-water all over the floor, staining and dissolving everything in my kitchen. FML

#10615901
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22185) - you deserved it (6405)

On 05/18/2010 at 9:23pm - misc - by MisterT (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my ex-boyfriend who I am still in love with sends me a text message that says "I miss you, baby". It turns out my name comes right after his girlfriend's name on his contact list. FML

#2236
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22184) - you deserved it (1668)

On 01/22/2009 at 5:47pm - love - by yeah... - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was riding the subway, reading a book, when a woman suddenly shoved a flyer over my book. Aghast by her rude gesture, I declined to take the paper. I looked over and noticed it was a flyer for a missing girl. FML

#18522067
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22185) - you deserved it (11797)

On 12/15/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by Ms. Heartless (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I made my friends and family laugh by trying to put on costume glasses with a giant super-sized nose attached to them. They laughed hysterically. Not because of the gigantic nose, but because my real nose was radically bigger and the fake one wouldn't fit over it. FML

#19606582
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22184) - you deserved it (2970)

On 05/11/2012 at 9:24am - misc - by MobPerfect (man) - United States (Rhode Island)



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