Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mum thought it was perfectly acceptable to post a status on Facebook about how well she is healing up after her hemorrhoid surgery, and tag me in it. FML

#19732110
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21444) - you deserved it (2321)

On 06/04/2012 at 11:02am - misc - by unacceptable (woman) - Australia

Today, for the second time in 5 months I was recognized for my hard work, sincerity and all the adjectives that they use to describe good employees. What was my reward? A piece of chocolate. FML

#13523513
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21444) - you deserved it (4128)

On 10/20/2010 at 10:33am - work - by rewarded (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, at a bus stop my friend told me that he loved me. I, reacting on impulse, told him how long I've wanted to hear him say that, and kissed him. Then I realised the look on his face. Turns out he'd said 'I need new shoes' not 'I love you.' FML

#5425819
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21442) - you deserved it (43858)

On 09/23/2009 at 10:10am - love - by Lifes_overated (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I gave my boyfriend a box of chocolates as a present. A few hours later, he texted me saying that the box of chocolates contained nuts. He's allergic to nuts and his mother now thinks I'm trying to kill him. FML

#6965324
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21443) - you deserved it (10136)

On 12/26/2009 at 11:44pm - love - by Kelly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my mother if she thought my cat was getting fat. She replied "It's not the cat you should worry about". FML

#5051
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21440) - you deserved it (4705)

On 02/01/2009 at 10:22pm - animals - by mikep - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, after a two week holiday, I'm returning to work exhausted. I had nightmares about work every single night. FML

#14444191
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21440) - you deserved it (3274)

On 01/02/2011 at 9:58pm - work - by sleepy (woman) - Norway

Today, I got a date for Valentine's Day. The date is with my orthodontist; he's going to tighten my braces. FML

#18984766
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21440) - you deserved it (3110)

On 02/03/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by tooembarassed - United States

Today, I offered an elderly man my seat on the train. He thanked me by winking and offering me a seat on his lap. FML

#19387576
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21438) - you deserved it (2945)

On 04/01/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I thought it would be funny to scare my dad for once, since he has scared me for fun dozens of times. It would have been funny, had he not punched me in the face. FML

#19244225
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21438) - you deserved it (6611)

On 03/09/2012 at 5:10am - misc - by stupidprankster - United States

Today, my cheater of an ex-boyfriend sent me one of his many messages proclaiming his new-found love for me, and in the middle of it asked me how my period was going. FML

#2979
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21434) - you deserved it (1788)

On 01/28/2009 at 6:47am - love - by uninspired - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my dad if I was a planned baby. He asked me if the crazy drunken party he and my mom had nine months prior to my birth counted. FML

#17441742
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21434) - you deserved it (4450)

On 08/11/2011 at 4:11pm - misc - by Michael tee - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was pointing out my car to my roommate. He responded with, "Oh that one with the broken window?" Turns out my car had been broken into. They took my CD player, GPS and Ipod. On top of that they left a Reese's Fastbreak wrapper and sunflower seeds on my front seat. FML

#7324506
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21432) - you deserved it (3100)

On 01/13/2010 at 7:08pm - misc - by Eli (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my husband and my cat have something in common; they both like to lick themselves. FML

#19812201
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21433) - you deserved it (2316)

On 06/19/2012 at 6:51am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: