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Today, I discovered my boyfriend's family approves of me, not because I'm friendly and intelligent, but because I'm an adequate addition to their gene pool. FML

#13458555
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21245) - you deserved it (3839)

On 10/15/2010 at 12:40pm - misc - by nick92 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I hit my boss's car. It's only my second day on the job. FML

#14230878
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21242) - you deserved it (9097)

On 12/17/2010 at 12:14am - work - by iswearicandrive (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I got a brand new couch. My husband told me to keep our puppy off of it so we could keep it nice. She jumped on it, and as I picked her up to put her back on the floor, her claws dragged across it and ripped 2 of the cushions. FML

#13050784
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21242) - you deserved it (8649)

On 09/14/2010 at 5:46pm - misc - by miss Suzanne - United States (New York)

Today, I had a dream that I was 25, unemployed, living with my parents, and still completely in love with someone who no longer feels the same way about me. Oh wait... it wasn't a dream. FML

#1809
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21241) - you deserved it (5655)

On 01/19/2009 at 11:23pm - misc - by HeadTrauma - United States (West Virginia)

Today, thinking we'd still be able to finish our project in time for tomorrow's deadline, my work group put off doing any work until today. When we logged into the website we have to use, we found it was down for maintenance all day. FML

#21173245
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21240) - you deserved it (42998)

On 06/13/2014 at 11:36am - work - by Anonymous - Afghanistan (Kabol)

Today, because I have a beach party tomorrow, I used a new gel that is supposed to prevent razor burn after shaving the bikini line. Turns out I'm highly allergic to the gel. Now I have hundreds of beautiful red bumps that look like razor burn. FML

#12989676
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21239) - you deserved it (3831)

On 09/10/2010 at 12:13pm - health - by moncheri1314 - Sent from mobile version

Today, at a job interview, I was asked what I thought of twerking. It was a bizarre question, but trying to get on the interviewer's good side, I said I thought it was pretty cool. He snorted and said I'll be job-seeking for a while yet. FML

#20870423
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21237) - you deserved it (42376)

On 09/06/2013 at 5:23pm - work - by howprofessional (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went on a date with a guy I met on-line. While cuddling on the couch, he asked me for a blow job. I refused. He said, "But I thought big girls liked doing that." FML

#7390667
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21236) - you deserved it (5437)

On 01/17/2010 at 12:30am - intimacy - by writer4life (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after having loaned my girlfriend money after she claimed to be broke and unable to pay her rent and electricity bills, she went out, spent it all on a new purse and phone, and now refuses to pay me back. FML

#20123887
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21238) - you deserved it (5841)

On 10/19/2012 at 1:05pm - money - by asparagus piss (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my landlord sent tree cutters to take down a tree in our front yard. I didn't realize their job included walking around the house and gratuitously staring at me through the window as I dressed. My boyfriend won't complain because he's afraid our rent will go up in retaliation. FML

#14554836
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21233) - you deserved it (7143)

On 01/12/2011 at 2:42pm - misc - by iheartnjdevils - United States (Texas)

Today, I had an upset stomach. I decided to quickly take out the trash before heading to the bathroom. As I opened the trash can lid, a raccoon jumped out. I learned the literal meaning of being scared shitless. FML

#20007279
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21232) - you deserved it (2218)

On 08/07/2012 at 5:19am - health - by TheCerealKiller - United States (California)

Today, someone spray painted a black skull on the side of my house. We painted over it and installed lights to hopefully persuade intruders not to vandalize the property because it would be a bright area. The lights were stolen. FML

#19362794
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21230) - you deserved it (2339)

On 03/28/2012 at 9:52am - misc - by andromeda80 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend accidentally broke my nose the day he was meeting my parents for the first time. FML

#19720513
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21229) - you deserved it (2004)

On 06/02/2012 at 11:34am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)



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