Sports and Marriage: FOOTBALL player reveals TRUTH! - FML

FOOTBALL player reveals TRUTH!

By fml9124 - 28/01/2021 20:01

Today, I told my wife Philip Rivers retired. Being born and bred in Baltimore, she hates anything Colts now. "Philip is a stupid name", she says. I pointed out my middle name is Philip. She laughed, then said, "Are you serious?" We've been married 33 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 847

You deserved it 125

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Same thing different taste

Does she really love me?

By fml9124 - 07/11/2019 20:00

Today, my wife and I watch the Chargers play the Packers. Philip Rivers is the Chargers quarterback. Out of the blue, my wife says "Philip is a stupid name." My middle name is Philip. We have been married 32 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 934

You deserved it 307

By Anonymous - 21/09/2011 18:39 - United States

Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because I have a cool last name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 971

You deserved it 4 511

By new name - 06/11/2012 22:03 - United States - Storrs Mansfield

Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 334

You deserved it 16 580

Get out

By Anonymous - 22/04/2022 10:00

Today, I’m considering a divorce. My father-in-law has never liked me and is very vocal about that, names like "bastard" and "prick" are common. My wife is normally very headstrong and takes no nonsense, but she lets him treat me this way so she must agree with him. The wedding was only a year ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 017

You deserved it 174

By Anonymous - 17/04/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, my husband of three years told me he only proposed to me because his favorite football team was winning and he had been drunk. I had our second child three days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93 517

You deserved it 5 332

By unloved - 18/01/2010 05:06 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife changed her name back to her maiden name. Why? So people would stop asking questions about us. We have been married for 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 034

You deserved it 2 753

By Anonymous - 15/05/2009 15:18 - United States

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I could never marry him because he's a Yankees fan. He told me he could never marry me because he couldn't see himself having a terrible love life for the rest of his life. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 689

You deserved it 13 989

By Anonymous - 17/09/2014 22:10 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out my wife named our son after her ex-lover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 823

You deserved it 3 387

Really!

By fml - 13/01/2020 07:00 - United States - Huntsville

Today, after receiving our marriage certificate, I told my wife about it. She responded with "fml". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 821

You deserved it 250

The patriarchy rules

By hyphen - 09/12/2020 18:01 - United States - Denver

Today, I was talking to a new friend when I told him my last name. It’s hyphenated. He then left and declared me to be a "stuck-up bitch" who thinks she’s "too good to take a man’s last name." This is the name I was born with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 977

You deserved it 114

Next

Top comments

Charlie Given 26

Thursday 28 January 2021 20:33

wow how does your wife not know your middle name that's kind of a red flag

RichardPencil 30

Friday 29 January 2021 2:16

Oh, I see the problem! You're dealing with a Baltimoron!

Comments

Charlie Given 26

Thursday 28 January 2021 20:33

wow how does your wife not know your middle name that's kind of a red flag

RichardPencil 30

Friday 29 January 2021 2:16

Oh, I see the problem! You're dealing with a Baltimoron!

Malachi Malachi 4

Monday 22 February 2021 17:10

wooooooww was she baked 😂

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The Top

Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 263

You deserved it 2 123

Today, I brought my daughter to work with me. When we walked in, a client was blowing up at my boss, all because as my boss was walking past his storage unit, he glanced in and was about to compliment how neat it was. After my boss left, I had to deal with the aftermath, which left my daughter terrified of this man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 86

The Top

Today, I got a call from a police department saying that if I didn't move my car from a store's parking lot within the next 15 minutes, they were going to tow it and charge me for the fee. I was at work and the reason I parked it there is because it started smoking and almost caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 701

You deserved it 4 901

Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 124

You deserved it 46 967

Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 600

You deserved it 47 648

Today, I woke up around 5am from a party I had last night, still quite drunk. This chick was lying next to me from the night before. I kissed her, and about a minute and a half into some heavy making out, she opened her eyes and said, "Oh, it's you." Then got up and walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 086

You deserved it 7 089

Today, my mom filled out a Facebook post called, “If your kid was named after your pregnancy cravings, what would their name be?” Apparently my sister would be “Passion fruit and coal dust” and I’d be “Mint sauce and butt sex.” What the hell kind of cravings are those? FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 167

Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 960

You deserved it 6 870