Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at my school, we had the opening night of our production in which I act. None of my family or friends came. Basically, after 3 long months of hard work, the only person to "congratulate" to me after the show was the head of the theater department, who just wanted to tell me I was doing it wrong. FML

#6594222
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22558) - you deserved it (3309)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:40am - misc - by drama_queen (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, we had a school assembly at 7:00 pm about drinking and driving. There was a cop doing a demonstration of a field sobriety test on stage. I was randomly selected to perform a breathalyzer test in front of all the students and parents. I blew 0.06. FML

#855959
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22557) - you deserved it (94426)

On 04/07/2009 at 4:44pm - health - by schoolgrlstaci (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that all the things I've lent to my best friend over the last few years that have never been returned were actually pawned off so she could pay her cable bill. FML

#19395452
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22557) - you deserved it (2827)

On 04/02/2012 at 2:44pm - money - by Kelly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work, a three year old chucked a chocolate bar at me. It hit me square in the face. Her father praised her for her "quality arm." FML

#13024649
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22556) - you deserved it (2602)

On 09/12/2010 at 8:08pm - misc - by tenthousandspoon - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I confirmed that my neighbors burn their garbage in their backyard. How? My dog just threw up a nice smelly consistency of spaghetti, plastic and cigarette butts on my carpet. FML

#14954664
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22553) - you deserved it (3365)

On 02/13/2011 at 3:36am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML

#9048258
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22551) - you deserved it (9871)

On 03/13/2010 at 2:32pm - misc - by smellsgood (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of ripping the skin off your bottom lip. FML

#16173128
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22548) - you deserved it (12609)

On 05/14/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by bloodyLIP - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I witnessed a homeless man fall off of his bike and land face first onto the pavement. Bleeding and shivering in the 40 degree weather, I gave him the coat off of my back. He got up like nothing happened and sprinted away with it. Oh yeah, my wallet was in the inside pocket. FML

#6005073
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22546) - you deserved it (30243)

On 10/26/2009 at 10:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized the closest thing I've had to an intimate relationship with a female is the one I have with my cat. Even then, she ignores me. FML

#18943699
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22544) - you deserved it (5102)

On 01/29/2012 at 2:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girlfriend and I broke up. The reason? She slept with four men while I was two weeks away visiting my brother. She told me it was because she missed me so much. FML

#8243991
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22543) - you deserved it (1946)

On 02/14/2010 at 10:19am - intimacy - by CheatedOn (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, I looked in my mouse's cage and noticed a tiny weed growing. I've been trying to grow a garden for years to no avail. Even my mouse is a better gardener than I am. FML

#15104344
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22543) - you deserved it (9929)

On 02/24/2011 at 6:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I changed all my plans, after months of him begging me to, so I could go to the same university as my long-term boyfriend. After I sent in my deposit, he told me we couldn't live together in college because I was "invading his space." FML

#13259314
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22543) - you deserved it (12510)

On 09/30/2010 at 1:31am - love - by stupidgirl (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the neck while she was cooking on the stove. Apparently I scared her and now I have a nice burn mark on my head from the hot frying pan she hit me with. FML

#13692696
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22545) - you deserved it (8721)

On 11/02/2010 at 8:57pm - misc - by StayPositive - United States (Maine)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: