Today, I found out that my grandfather, who is a retired Marine, has paid real money to buy ALL the Lady Gaga themed items for his farm in FarmVille. I don't know what's worse, that he did it, or that I'm jealous of not having that stuff. FML
by Mandy / 05/20/2011 at 12:12am / United States (California) / Geek
by rileycrash / 05/19/2011 at 10:08pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Devon / 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
marmots's comment : It sounds like you've been partying with Ke$ha.
Today, I'm the coach of a football team. To celebrate winning a game, they poured a cooler of blue Gatorade over my head. This would've been great, if not for the fact that I'm highly allergic to blue food dye. FML
kingtz's comment : Did people just stand there and watch you go into anaphylatic shock, thinking it was your celebration dance?
Today, I took my 6 year old son to meet our new neighbours. When we got home he packed his bags and headed for the door. Once he reached the door, I asked where he was going. He replied, "To the neighbours'. They have a bigger television." FML
by Anonymous / 05/19/2011 at 7:05pm / Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador) / Kids
by forkmylife / 05/19/2011 at 6:57pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Olovio's comment : Bet you can't wait for sporks!
by Username / 05/19/2011 at 6:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by esoog / 05/19/2011 at 1:38pm / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML
Today, I went shopping with my cousin. Walking down the road, I heard her say "Can you hold my hand?" I was confused, but thought it was cute, so I held her hand and kept walking. It turns out she'd asked me to hold her bag. We didn't say another word after that. FML
by awkwardd / 05/19/2011 at 8:51am / Hong Kong / Miscellaneous
by stranded / 05/19/2011 at 7:46am / United States / Transportation
by ThisPerson / 05/19/2011 at 6:11am / Canada / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/19/2011 at 1:58am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…