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Three years

By sleep deprived - 15/11/2019 20:00

Today, it's been three years since my sister gave me a kitten. Coincidentally, it’s also been three years since I've had sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 602

You deserved it 369

Where do these guys come from?

By Anonymous - 13/04/2022 04:00

Today, my boyfriend moved out because our son was diagnosed autistic and he is completely uninterested in raising a child who will never be "normal" and who will "never make him proud." He also said if I want child support I’ll have to take him to court because no way is he paying willingly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 067

You deserved it 224

By Anonymous - 10/06/2019 20:00

Today, after I finally got the money for a pool, I built a deck, filled it a quarter of the way, then all the 4x4 beams collapsed. The pool ripped in half, flooding the yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 302

You deserved it 896

Suspicious Minds

By Kelly - 29/11/2016 18:57

Today, I discovered that my 17-year-old daughter received several weird deposits from Paypal. I checked her phone to discover that she had changed the password for the first time in years. Fearing drugs, I confronted her. She broke down and confessed to selling rare digital Pokemon on eBay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 800

You deserved it 2 443

Picky eater

By Anonymous - 04/06/2022 22:00

Today, my family are refusing to go out to eat with me anymore. Apparently, me liking my food cooked a certain way infuriates them because it delays our order, and makes the wait staff hate us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 349

You deserved it 1 486

Dirty room

By love you too honey boo - 13/01/2020 05:00

Today, I sent a scantily clad pic to my boyfriend, to which he responded "Nice, but please clean your room". FML

I agree, your life sucks 957

You deserved it 2 343

By Anonymous - 23/08/2019 00:01

Today, I spent five hours in the back seat of a car with two dogs. Both had been sprayed by a skunk earlier in the day. One had a gas problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 747

You deserved it 216

Love Hurts

By Anonymous - 30/08/2017 04:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned that one of my friends is in love with me. How did I find out? A punch to the face from the boy she's supposed to be in a relationship with, for "coaxing her away" from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 839

You deserved it 252

Suspicious

By Anonymous - 22/04/2021 11:01

Today, I found out why I’ve been covering most of the bills and the rent. Turns out my boyfriend is paying a very expensive OnlyFans subscription for his female bestie. When I confronted him about it, he responded by yelling, “It’s not like that!” and punched our glass patio door, shattering it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 712

You deserved it 263

By Pugsley - 30/08/2019 14:02 - Australia

Today, for my birthday, I found out I'm too ugly even for a hooker to have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 254

You deserved it 367

Breaking news

By Anonymous - 12/10/2023 14:00 - United States - Phoenix

Today, while at a family dinner, my boyfriend's family explained how he needs to learn family recipes to pass down to his future children. He responded, "Why would I ever start a family? I hate kids." I'm currently seven weeks pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 732

You deserved it 439

By Anonymous - 13/10/2017 01:30

Today, I met my favourite singer, but when she signed my CD, the marker was out of ink. By the time I realised there was no signature, she was already gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 191

You deserved it 408

By Anonymous - 21/10/2017 05:00 - Denmark - Viborg

Today, a friend sent me a video of my boyfriend of 2.5 years and the girl I "shouldn't be worried about" on a date at the restaurant he claimed he hated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 336

You deserved it 273

Dared

By Anonymous - 27/09/2019 02:01

Today, I was dared to stand and hold a sign saying, "Free Hugs." This girl I'd never seen before gave me a crushing hug and cried hysterically on my shoulder in the blazing afternoon sun. I couldn't get her off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 1 217

House rules

By Anonymous - 08/10/2019 22:00

Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for months. Not knowing where the date would take us, I shaved my pubic hair. Later, in the middle of making out with the guy, my dad storms into the room to tell me, "I had to get some Draino, your pubes clogged the shower." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 240

You deserved it 1 275

Keep it in the family

By LY2 - 25/10/2019 02:00

Today, I found out why my boyfriend won't come over anymore. He and my brother apparently had a "thing" before we started dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 932

You deserved it 140

Hangover

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 14:00

Today, I got really sick after drinking a lot of alcohol and started throwing up. Every time I threw up into the toilet, the water would splash back up into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 3 220

By CreeptacularBait - 21/03/2018 15:00

Today, after my husband trusted me to sort out the arrangements for modifying our kitchen and I spent a lot of time finding the perfect top-quality items, they were delivered 1,291 miles away in a town I’ve never heard of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 872

You deserved it 567

Weird dude

By Anonymous - 29/02/2020 05:00

Today, while finishing shopping with my kids, my female best friend and I were accosted by a street preacher. He screamed that we were an abomination, having biracial children was a sin against nature, and that we were ruining America. Not only we are not gay, he made my kids cry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 916

You deserved it 353

Nice guys

By Anonymous - 17/07/2021 04:01

Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend handed me this month’s rental statement with “Paid” written in red ink. He says it’s my gift, because, "that shit adds up every month" and I should be "grateful" that I have a roof over my head for another month instead of being "materialistic." FML

I agree, your life sucks 957

You deserved it 520

When you gotta go, you gotta go

By Amanda Howard - 15/03/2020 09:00

Today, I came home after being stuck in traffic needing to pee really badly. When I went to the bathroom, my boyfriend was on the toilet. I couldn't hold it longer, so I went into the woods behind our house and found a bush. Relieving myself, my butt started to itch. I was sitting in Poison Ivy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 598

You deserved it 540

cringe intensifies

By ShamefulShoop - 31/05/2018 19:00

Today, I took my mother grocery shopping. From the opposite end of the snack aisle, she yelled, "They don't have my darkies! Ya know how I like my darkies!” She was talking about dark pretzels. I don’t think the appalled black couple next to me knew that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 645

You deserved it 307

Thug life

By secretagentsam00 - 31/03/2020 23:00

Today, I found out my dog is a felon. He broke into a neighbor's house by breaking in through the screen door. He also vandalized their property by shitting on their carpet. Our neighbors are now considering suing us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 650

You deserved it 572

No pain, no meds

By I don’t stink - 01/05/2020 20:00

Today, I finally got to come home after hours spent in a locked down ER after a car accident. My injuries were non life-threatening, but pretty damn painful. I asked my sister to pick up my pain meds from the pharmacy for me. She got drunk and "lost them", AKA gave them to her dirtbag boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 019

You deserved it 317

By Matti - 17/08/2018 22:00

Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 222

You deserved it 245

Get it on, bang a gong

By can’t sleep - 17/06/2020 17:04

Today, and for the fourth time in a week, my 60-year-old neighbors have woken me up by having obnoxiously loud sex. Complete with over the top moaning and the headboard smashing against our shared wall. When I asked them nicely to quiet down, they laughed and called me jealous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 076

You deserved it 381

By Anonymous - 25/08/2018 18:30

Today, while waiting for my job interview to start, I tried to slip out a silent fart. It ended with shit running down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 631

You deserved it 1 380

By Anonymous - 19/09/2018 22:15

Today, I was flirting with a guy and we ended up having a deep conversation through text. We were talking all our problems, and saying really sweet things to each other. I THOUGHT he was going to say something else really sweet and cute. He linked me to Suicide Hotline instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 952

You deserved it 558

By IGiveUp - 07/10/2018 13:30

Today, at work, I took a call from an angry customer. After listening to his problem and fully explaining how we could fix it, he called me a stupid girl and said I need more training as I obviously know nothing about my job. I'm the company training coordinator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 023

You deserved it 227

Are you doing OK?

By Anonymous - 10/01/2026 20:00

Today, my son is only two but I'm already plagued by the idea of him one day having a wife or girlfriend. I'm being kept awake at night by the betrayal of something that hasn't even happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56

You deserved it 904

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The Top

Today, due to the heat, I had a deadly asthma attack. Where was my inhaler? My dad pawned it for beer money. What did my dad do about my attack? Told me to quit being a Drama Queen. I had to go across the street and beg for a ride to the ER from my neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 255

You deserved it 3 591

Today, I had a hour long conversation with someone I apparently was friends with a few years ago. I couldn't remember who he was for the life of me, so I just played along. Finally, I told him I didn't remember him. He had the wrong number. I had a long conversation with a wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 249

You deserved it 51 263

Today, I've told my boyfriend several times that my toothless grandma can only eat pureed foods, but likes any kind of soup, "as long as there's no meat in it." Guess what was his idea of a gift for her when meeting her for the first time? A steak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 505

You deserved it 192

Today, I was falling in love with the nostalgia of having handwritten love letters and flowers left on my windshield. Turns out my "secret admirer" was just a mean prank conjured up by my coworkers. They laughed. I cried, hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 379

You deserved it 278

Today, I saved a woman from being mugged, and stayed with her until the police arrived. At which point she ignored me completely, and thanked the handsome 20-something police officer for making her feel safe, like I did nothing. Ungrateful cow. Next time the mugger can have your handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 377

You deserved it 1 404

Today, I had such an intense stomach ache I couldn’t even stand up. I ended up shitting my pants. I’m 13. FML

I agree, your life sucks 578

You deserved it 143