Today, my wife's pregnancy hormones made her extremely horny. The doctor said that intercourse during pregnancy was very healthy, so we decided to do it. Let's just say that the bumpy ride didn't help her morning sickness. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my husband finally was ready to have sex, even though he feels it's a bit weird because I'm pregnant. Due to morning sickness, I threw up all over him. FML
Today, my husband said sex is too weird because I'm pregnant with our first baby. He gets very grumpy without sex. I'm very horny with hormones. Only 6 more months. FML
Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML
Today, I got motion sickness while having sex. FML
Today, my wife has been using "pregnancy hormones" as an excuse for absolutely everything. Spills a milkshake in bed at one in the morning? Pregnancy hormones! Cries about a hole in her sock? Pregnancy hormones! Gets caught fucking her coworker? Pregnancy hormones! FML
Today, I'm pregnant and feeling awful due to all-day-long morning sickness. My doctor suggested that I cancel all my social plans to be able to keep working. My doctor is also my husband, and the father of this child. FML
Today, I learned that my insatiable appetite and sex drive is because I'm 5 months pregnant. I'm married to a woman. We had a threesome one drunken night. FML
Today, I'm 23 weeks pregnant and super horny. I also cried during sex with my husband because I can't orgasm. FML
Today, my pregnant wife suggested we have fun tonight since we haven't had sex in three months. She also said we'll be having waffles and sausage. I'm actually more excited about the food than the sex. FML
Today, my wife's pregnancy hormones got so bad that she freaked out and threw a tantrum, accusing me of always making important decisions for her. All I did was get her some food from Taco Bell as a surprise. FML
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Top comments
whysobeachy 37
Was it worth it, to her? Also, next time, you can try positions which require less movement on her part. Or you can try grinding, instead of thrusting.
Ashamed_Sister 60
Doesn't matter, had sex.
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Comments (42)
whysobeachy 37
Was it worth it, to her? Also, next time, you can try positions which require less movement on her part. Or you can try grinding, instead of thrusting.
laurellkawes 31
He meant she was on top, and I'm guessing from now on she won't be doing any riding
Ashamed_Sister 60
Doesn't matter, had sex.
vikky538 29
Came for this comment. Not disappointed
quinn1184 25
sounds messy. and not in the good way
bananassin 25
Oh it must of been very dirty
JKPwnage 27
must've*
PuppiesKisses 19
Maybe next time go nice and slow instead of blowing her like snow.
TheBestAround23 13
I believe you mean plowing her like snow
iiTzNeeNerz 26
If you're wife is wiling, do it again and try to find a rhythm that won't trigger her morning sickness, you know? Maybe turn the motion in the ocean down a notch.
football98_fml 20
Syphilis. It's always gotta be syphilis.
whysobeachy 37
I think you misread the FML.
juturnaamo 29
The lazy dog was my favorite when I was pregnant. it's like doggy, but you're on your sides.
whysobeachy 37
So basically like spooning? I was thinking about that position, too.
False_Stupidity 42
Good name for it, it's one of my favorites too.
DarkRaiiin 8
Another piece of advice I don't see is if you want to do missionary put a pillow under her back to prop her up so her belly isn't in the way. My wife and I did that to some success.
kowsee 22
Be gentle and there are other ways to have her satisfied