Today, I was visiting my boyfriend, who lives 2 hours away. After about twenty minutes of glorious sex, he told me in no uncertain terms that he was about to come. He then "baaa"d like a sheep as he came. I couldn't come after that. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is." Orgasm gone. FML
Today, I met up with my boyfriend early before work to have some "fun time". We hadn't had sex in a while and decided to try it doggy style, up against the wall. We had been doing it for about 15 minutes until he abruptly stopped and said, "I don't know if it's in." It was. FML
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Top comments
bigbadtim 7
That's baaaad!
Richisme 0
The Animal, tis' in us all.
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Comments (181)
greendaygirl999 5
LOL
dodoo_fml 0
MAN UP SHEEP BOY.
meepz 0
Quit foolin around
rattioh 0
Get some NUTS.
FunkyMonk174 0
your boyfriend must think you look like a sheep. I hope you are pregnant now *****.
conrewjr 0
u mean cum?
Stupified 0
Op I'm sure he was just kidding around. No need to get so hoarse, you'll make him feel sheepish. Sure, it was a baaad move on his part, but I'm gonna go out on a lamb and say you should forgive him. Don't be a chicken though, you need to stand up to his bull!
Lozza111 0
58=epic win. rino what you did there
Meeeowzers 0
Ha ha, 58 actually made me laugh out loud. :D I'm surprised no one else commented on that...
_PAK_G96Unit_ 0
hahahahaha I'm suprised nobody thought of that. lol
rawr_and_stuff_s 0
omg I <3 your photo
awkwardepicfail 0
hmm, this reminds me of the FML where some chicks boyfriend "meowed" when he came.
Lozza111 0
hippo, hippo, horay for 58... sorry, couldn't resist
Melgros 0
Cum*
princess711 0
That was hysterical @ #58.... I'm having a shitty day and I smiled because of this
Icyyy 0
He baaa'd 'like a sheep'? What else would he baaaaaaa like? A ******* cow?
benny2465 0
lmfao 30
xXshotsXx 0
30. your so hot
fat_snooki_lol 6
OP was fantasizing about his recent trip to New Zealand.
thelastjedi 0
laaaaawl sheep laaaawl pwned anyways why did the sheep turn you off that much :s
Tweety122888 0
op I don't think anyone can cum after that rofl
isallwaysme 27
@FunkyMonk, why do you say she's a *****? because she's having sex with her boyfriend? they've probably been together a long time to have sex dumbass.
breenntt 0
=
kaijapapaya 0
Aww, I'm sorry OP. It's fun every once and a while to be silly during sex, but not when you've not seen each other in so long. You'll just have to make up for it later ;)
Richisme 0
The Animal, tis' in us all.
bigbadtim 7
That's baaaad!
h2opoloplaya 0
ahahahahahaha no
hiphop_danca94 2
THAT was bad lol
riseagainst8767x 0
lol
xToLeGiiT 0
haha , Niice one
TripleJumpMan 0
haha meow
MissGrinch 4
Ohh, hello. ;)
timma90 4
^ love this.
macgruberiscool 0
haha you should do the same thing when one of his friends comes over
Kokihi 0
um...i think you ment "cum"
1Silverfox 0
It can be spelled both ways.
lemoncows 2
lol don't you love correcting people who try to correct?
HahaHokayThen 10
number 16, I think you meant, "meant." the period is on the inside of the quotations. :D
breegee 0
#99 uhmmm no. #16 was right. the period should be outside it should only be on the inside if it was #7's last word which isn't . haha just saying! lol we're such grammar nazis it's just a website people :)
Mehness 0
104 - In the English language, punctuation is always inside the quotation marks, even if it doesn't make much sense.
Dorkalopolis 0
I'm an English major and if it's not a quote to the end of the sentence the period goes after the parenthesis. In fact according to MLA format, the correct way to document a correction if you are quoting it is to use brackets. In any case they were not quoting them but fixing it but it still would not have a period in the correction because that would mean the correction included the period. :)
Msraina 8
They're not parentheses, they're quotation marks.
lizamaphone 6
"come" is correct. "cum" is slang, but also correct. also, as everyone else had said, don't correct someone if you can't spell the word "meant"
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
The punctuation in or out of quotation marks issue varies by region. The British English rules are different than the American English rules. pendatik's usage was correct, since he's English.
xgetxbentx 13
110 - you fail as an English major then.... these " " are quotation marks, not parenthesis, those look like this ( ). also, I'm aware my grammar in this comment was far from perfect, I'm on my itouch and it's nearly 6am.
beccalynn55 0
if it's nearly 6am than why does it say you posted it at 12:22 ?
InDenial 6
Different time zones dude...
alyssaax3 0
maybe if u learn to spell it you'll be able to do it..
MissGrinch 4
Maybe if you learn how to spell "you" correctly, someone will take your comment seriously. Seriously.
greendaygirl999 5
Thank you, 11.
xITZxTuRtLeX 0
thanks 17 for the awesome pic of girr
7basher7 0
exacly my point
SixDeuce 0
They just need some push through the fence that's all
yourWIFEandKIDS 0
LOL WTF?
ShimmyPizza 0
I love BMTH and I love your picture! =D
that_guy_ollie 0
chealse smile FTW!
t123d 0
#12's picture is of Chelsea Grin's self-titled album's cover and CG is better than BMTH haha