Anonymous
Altamonte Springs, United States 🌶️ Spicy
That was quick
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
anon
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I tried to wake my boyfriend up to sex. When I went to touch his penis, he elbowed me in the face, mumbled an apology and began snoring again. FML
Noname
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML
Karly
🌶️ Spicy
Snooze fest
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while still giving me oral sex. FML
bobin
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend kept falling asleep while he was at my house with me. I tried to have sex with him to help wake him up, but he said he was too tired and fell back asleep. Five minutes later, my friend walks in the room with food. He woke up from the smell and got up to get some for himself. FML
Light Sleeper
Evansville, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
sarabellekitty
🌶️ Spicy
Relaxed
Today, I was having really great sex with my boyfriend. I was on top and he seemed like he was really enjoying it. Then, I realized he'd fallen asleep. FML
Anonymous
Citrus Heights, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Gimme the D
Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML
Married Life 101
🌶️ Spicy
Today, my husband woke up in the middle of the night feeling frisky. He woke me up, got me all hot and ready to go, then before I could get into position he fell back to sleep, leaving me to fend for myself. FML
ohfantastic
United States
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Top comments
olpally 33
Well, that escalated quickly...
shrimp1234 4
He has no staying power at all.
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Comments (155)
shrimp1234 4
He has no staying power at all.
innavoiG 9
OP couldn't just wait for him to wake up??
doctorhook86 25
1: This isn't about staying power, it's about the awesome dream the OP just helped her bf have.
DespairFaction 11
You gotta get the first one out of the way.
bigtaytay 13
She definitely roused him
Soulvaki 0
Rouse means to wake.
Aaron810 6
Yeah your life is definitely over... Not
ScruffyFML 10
Guess he would of had what I'd call an wet dream ;) Don't worry about it tho, you can try again tomorrow. :P
DontThumbMeDown 8
Would have*
Codezlol 21
Or y'know in like 5-10 minutes works too
conomaca2 6
A wet dream not "an wet dream"
supportcommand 17
Though. Not tho.
0ops_i_died 8
=P not :P
0ops_i_died 8
Oh relax, I was just being a smart ass
PYLrulz 17
44 - If you want to play along, I can say you need a comma between dream and not
fahd4life 1
Haha... Agreed!
penguinsniper822 4
This just turned into a giant grammar Nazi party.
xxdark 3
*dances!
Evilpirate 10
Nazis these days
kakkyman 4
I know right: can't live with them, can't live without them.
CoriCat 25
It's called a wet dream smart kne
SouthernPride95 19
Stupid FML
zoPwNAgEzo 21
Rouse him, or rape him? Damn women, go easy
XTheDesertSongX 17
Don't even act like your dumb ass wouldn't enjoy waking up to that. You just seem like a douche.
slurshies 11
wow, judgy...
AClassActx3 7
Woman **
cajekraze 7
At least I'm not the only one who sees this as rape. Rape doesn't have to be violent. Nonconsentual sex is the very definition of rape
0ops_i_died 8
It doesn't sound like she was trying to be sneaky or malicious about it, I know my husband enjoys a little morning surprise every now and again. I see it as a harmless tactic to spice things up in the bedroom
ebonyirony 29
That and if a mans circulation is properly functioning, he will be hard. Not all morning wood is due to being aroused.
onlychildFTW 34
Morning wood just happens even if you aren't aroused. That's being a boy. And who wouldn't like to wake up to a little head? Haha.
Soulvaki 0
I wouldn't consider morning sex rape. They just slept together. That's plenty of consensus.
tonedef456 8
Even though he'd probably love to get some when he wakes up, he still wasn't conscious enough to give consent. That's technically rape.
patrick29 1
How sad
BigBoyBounce 5
What a very intriguing and inciteful response. Please, please go on.
walmartpaysme 15
Yes because your comment has enlightened us all #15
acidkitten 14
#15 insightful*
BigBoyBounce 5
I know that wasn't a smart comment. A few minutes after i posted it i looked back and realized my mistake.
CaptainDoorknob 7
15 - Your comment most definitely contributed to this prosperous community of ours as well.
spud11763 14
So nice guys finish first? Or…
onlychildFTW 34
Nice guys always let the girl finish first whenever possible.
KiddNYC1O 22
I'd sell the Veyron and keep the McLaren.
ScaughtieHolden 11
He doesn't own either though, I'd sell the Bugatti and buy a McLaren Mp4-12c ;]
dragonforerunner 2
Sell both then buy a GTR "Alpha-Omega" and a track
the_true_batman 10
Sleeping guys finish first is a much better comment.
KiddNYC1O 22
67- Shit, and a nice house!
snakeassault 0
I'd sell that ugly Bugatti, buy a '75 Corvette and an Ariel Atom V8.
onlychildFTW 34
A 1975 corvette? Why not go for a better year? The 70s weren't friendly to north American car designs. I wish I owned those. I only own a SL500. *sigh* how much I want a 2009 SLR McLaren 722s.
Church_Vii 4
Hey, at least it was a pleasant surprise for him.
olpally 33
Well, that escalated quickly...
JoeRogansBEARD 15
I love lamp
PYLrulz 17
LOUD NOISES!!!
spud11763 14
Ejaculated* ?
Mauskau 36
No, spud.
walmartpaysme 15
If you cannot understand sarcasm or innuendo please stop commenting on FML.
rockinbecca2 4
Ur hot Michael haha
bigdude1302 2
Well atleast one of you enjoyed it.
gc327072 31
"glad you came" anyone?
gc327072 31
"the D goes up, the D goes down..."
Ronald87 7
I know ryt!