Today, I was visiting my boyfriend, who lives 2 hours away. After about twenty minutes of glorious sex, he told me in no uncertain terms that he was about to come. He then "baaa"d like a sheep as he came. I couldn't come after that. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is." Orgasm gone. FML
Today, I met up with my boyfriend early before work to have some "fun time". We hadn't had sex in a while and decided to try it doggy style, up against the wall. We had been doing it for about 15 minutes until he abruptly stopped and said, "I don't know if it's in." It was. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
bigbadtim 7
That's baaaad!
Richisme 0
The Animal, tis' in us all.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (181)
Tovlu 0
only 20 mins?
Johnnieeeeee 0
"20 minutes of glorious sex." One word. inexperience.
dickster 0
It's spelled cum...
Bblock 5
u shouldA moood
Trollz4daLULZ 2
Not in the moooood? That's udderly ridiculous! Not to milk this for all it's worth, or anything...
Ray_of_midnight 23
at least he didn't shout "Who's your daaaaaady?"
whiteshyspy 0
cum not come
whiteshyspy 0
cum not come
bigbirta 0
ydi. ever heard of abstinence? it's something mature adults do UNTIL they're married.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Oh, that's crap. Premarital abstinence is fine, but it doesn't automatically make you a more mature or morally upright person. Get off your high horse.
SettoFail 9
that's hilariousssss
skyeyez9 25
At least he didn't grunt like a koala. It's crazy how a cute koala bear can make such a horrid sound. It's a cross between a big long burp/pig/grunt all mixed together.