Today, while on a date, I desperately let out a stealth fart in my date's car. I didn't have the nerve to own up to it, even as he started panicking and thinking the smell was coming from his engine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I moved around a little, so my date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassed, giving me a reassuring look. FML
Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML
Today, I was on a first date with a girl at the movies. Trying to be polite, I held in a fart until an intense, loud action scene came on. As soon as I let go, the scene went silent and my fart was clearly heard to everyone in the movie theatre. My date went to the bathroom. She didn't come back. FML
Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML
Today, I was out on my first date in months. My stomach didn’t feel quite right after dinner, but I tried to ignore it. During the movie, it got so bad I decided to try to sneak a small fart for relief. As soon as I did, the theater fell dead silent. My fart practically echoed in the silence. FML
Today, I farted while I was in the car with my driving instructor and my partner. They couldn't hear it, but it smelled so bad that my instructor thought there was a gas leak, and he made us switch cars. FML
Today, while wearing a sexy pair of undies for my partner and taking him out on a nice dinner, I trusted a fart walking from the car to the restaurant and shit myself. FML
Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML
Today, while flirting with a cute nurse at my dad's bedside, I accidentally let a noxious fart slip out and she thought the foul smell came from my sleeping father soiling himself. I let her roll him over and check his ass while he cried out in pain because I wasn't man enough to own up to it. FML
Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
khorstmye 15
He knew. He was trying to take the attention away from you so you wouldn't be embarrassed.
cutycat136 28
Own up to it. If he takes it bad, maybe not a choice for you. Considering everyone has to fart sometimes, he should understand that it happens. Shouldn't be a big deal.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (82)
buckdharma 38
Maybe his car runs on used cooking oil. If that's the case he'll just think he got some bad Taco Supremium.
martin8337 36
This is 2015, I don't know why people are still weirded out about farting. Hell, everyone farts, burps, pisses and *****.
Carnaxa 8
yes but the moment you do it indiscriminately you are a gross ass mofo and you need to go. I mean its all well and good to pretend to be open minded and if someone does all that in front of you, you will be grossed out. And frankly its quite rude if they do
rockwrench 18
Take a Beano after dinner and you'll be fart free.
saidaswear 20
I just found the dude's side of this story in Moderation?
ZoroMiHawk 25
Some people for some reason enjoy making fake FML's in response to a published FML.
ZoroMiHawk 25
I have to question your date's basic intelligence if he cannot distinguish the difference between the smell of a fart and the smell of smoke coming out of his car's engine.
HollyPolly 19
omg that is funny. you gotta do what you gotta do
thejonac 21
honestly farting is a natural thing so just admit it and your date might even be impressed with you being brave
Carnaxa 8
he will in no way be impressed. smelling someone elses fart is plain nasty. you yourself wont want to sit and take some deep breaths after some farts right (if you do you should get help). If someone farts around you you wont want to smell it, it will gross you out. I dont blame OP for not owning up to it, its not like this guy is someone close where you laugh it off.
dakatabg 31
Did it smell like burned oil?
LostInTheZone11 29
Ah yes, this sounds like what is know as "The Burning Brakes Fart".
spike7447 13
Lmao!