Today, we had a school assembly at 7:00 pm about drinking and driving. There was a cop doing a demonstration of a field sobriety test on stage. I was randomly selected to perform a breathalyzer test in front of all the students and parents. I blew 0.06. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML
Takes one to know one
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Bladder control
Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad, so I speeded up to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML
Straight to jail
Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML
Today, I was pulled over by the cops for a random breathalyzer test. They asked to see my license. I always keep my wallet in my car for situations like this. I received a $100 ticket because my mum apparently didn’t think it was a good idea to keep my wallet in the car. FML
Today, I was driving on the freeway when I saw a car in front of me swerving across 3 lanes of traffic. Thinking he might be drunk, I dialed 911 on my phone, but I dropped it. I fished under my seat to get it, swerving, and got pulled over by highway patrol and given a field sobriety test. FML
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
Today, I got pulled over during my driving test. FML
Today, I found out that I can't pass a field sobriety test while sober. FML
Today, I was supposed to give a presentation to the incoming freshman about the dangers of drinking in college. My co-presenter showed up drunk. FML
Top comments
poopypeepee 0
um..what were you doing drunk at school??? ydi
mrgorbachev 0
That's ridiculous-- you can't say yes because then they'll know you're drunk, and you can't say no because then they'll know you're drunk. Sucks.
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Comments (303)
Darcy_fml 0
I bet,haha, this is the kind of guy (or girl) who smokes pot behind the gym.
Conker37224 0
Even though my reply to you is a year late but I have to say you seem like the kind of asshole who laughs at their own jokes.
browneyedcutie 0
who said they were drinking before the assembly?! i didnt read anything about them saying they were drinking alcohol!
UrLifeDoesntSuck 0
I didn't think of it that way, 39 :). If it was a teacher, I don't blame her at all. @44 In case you're not joking, there is really no way you could blow a .05 without drinking.
geesquared 0
lol @13. How old are you? 6% BAC?!
starcheckered 0
everyone here is being ridiculous. .06 is still legal to drive. that's why they were "drunk" at a drinking & driving assembly. .06 is only like 2 beers for the average person, so if they had a glass of wine or two at dinner before going back to school....
Yuuhi 0
the same or a high amount of alco would show up if u used a mouth wash just before leaving...
may_cause_fail 0
...Why would you go to something like that drunk? YDI. Dumbass.
SophiaMay 0
#19 it says PM and ahaha kinda sucks funny though, YDI in all fairness. Teacher? or student? or Parent?
alex_vik 1
YDI for drinking and then going to school.
glynnd 0
There are a bunch of squares in here. Live a little, get drunk or high before school. I mean shit, thats what a lot of people do in college, takes the edge, eases your nerves. lighten up,