Today, we had a school assembly at 7:00 pm about drinking and driving. There was a cop doing a demonstration of a field sobriety test on stage. I was randomly selected to perform a breathalyzer test in front of all the students and parents. I blew 0.06. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad, so I speeded up to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML
Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML
Today, I was pulled over by the cops for a random breathalyzer test. They asked to see my license. I always keep my wallet in my car for situations like this. I received a $100 ticket because my mum apparently didn’t think it was a good idea to keep my wallet in the car. FML
Today, I was driving on the freeway when I saw a car in front of me swerving across 3 lanes of traffic. Thinking he might be drunk, I dialed 911 on my phone, but I dropped it. I fished under my seat to get it, swerving, and got pulled over by highway patrol and given a field sobriety test. FML
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
Today, I got pulled over during my driving test. FML
Today, I found out that I can't pass a field sobriety test while sober. FML
Today, I was supposed to give a presentation to the incoming freshman about the dangers of drinking in college. My co-presenter showed up drunk. FML
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Top comments
poopypeepee 0
um..what were you doing drunk at school??? ydi
mrgorbachev 0
That's ridiculous-- you can't say yes because then they'll know you're drunk, and you can't say no because then they'll know you're drunk. Sucks.
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Comments (303)
love_lucy 0
#9, under 21 there is a NO TOLERANCE policy even if she had .01% she would have been in trouble the fact that this person went to an ASSEMBLY makes me believe that she is in high school
Lala_Land14 0
Wait were you actually a little drunk? Or was the thing possibly broken or something?
mbe722 0
anyone think to consider that this could be a teacher, or a parent even? in that case it would be completely legal for them to have lets say.. gone to happy hour and then to their kids' assembly? stop freaking out
Brave_L_Toaster 7
Her username is schoolgrlstaci. Not a teacher or parent.
stephfml 0
13--actually it is .06%, we just don't use the percent symbol because we abbreviate it. did you really think your blood could be 6% alcohol?! honestly.
BaldOuting 0
awesome. that is one way to survive an assembly.
screwloose 0
I completely believed it was a teacher. And if I were a teacher who was required to be at a school assembly at 7 PM with all my students and their parents, you bet there'd be some hooch passing around!
stephfml 0
UrLifeDoesntSuck 0
@13, in this context, the ".06" does refer to ".06%" (look up BAC on Wikipedia). If your blood was 6% alcohol, you'd be very dead. OP, YDI completely for drinking before a school assembly / during school.
cdonnae 0
hahaha looove ittt
mobitsfa 1
WTH school at 7pm? I would'nt be caught dead at a school around that time.