Today, my pre-teen brother has started using the entire Axe line because he believes that it will give him an "edge with the ladies". He insists on using the products at least three times a day, including before bedtime. I'm allergic to anything that is perfumed. We share a room. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 13-year-old son discovered Axe. Axe shower gel. Axe shampoo. Axe body spray. All at once. FML
Today, my son sprayed Axe body-spray all over the house in the vain hope of covering up the scent of the joints he'd been smoking. FML
Today, my brother's refused to shower after 2 weeks of dripping sweat and never changing clothes. He claims the smell is just his "manly musk" and if I can't handle it, then maybe I'm the problem. FML
Today, my brother decided deodorant causes cancer. He goes to the gym every day. FML
Today, I taught my 12-year-old brothers that showering cannot be used as a substitute for deodorant, and that they should use both. One of them was almost in tears. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mom got him a shitload of Axe for his birthday. Now I get nauseous whenever I go near him. FML
Today, my 12-year-old son and 13-year-old daughter sprayed themselves with a ton of deodorant and perfume respectively. The two clouds of spray have combined into a noxious gas that slowly traveled through the house, giving everybody an instant, massive headache. Everybody, except my son and daughter. They think they smell great. FML
Today, my brother got the same cologne as the guy I've been seeing for a while. Every time I'm with my brother I think about him, and every time I'm with him I think about my brother. FML
Today, I discovered my brother likes to use our kitchen utensils to scratch his private areas. FML
Today, my brother came out of the shower and sat with my mom and me on the couch. He then says he liked the idea of the extra toothbrush in the shower, it helps him clean between his toes. I have been using that to brush my teeth for the last two weeks. FML
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Top comments
McNikk 15
Axe him to stop.
tupelo 6
Ugh.. I wish guys didn't think using a shitload of Axe makes them smell good.
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Comments (118)
TogeBara 12
a brother and sister should NOT be sharing a room in the first place, especially when he just is hitting the stage where he thinks he needs an "edge with the ladies" if he can't get by on regular scent and charm he wont get anywhere with axe
omgthisisgay 10
It's pretty possible OP has had to share her room for the past 11-12 years. It really shouldn't take that long to sell a house. Brother and sister sharing a room is ok if they are both young, like toddler age, or even if only one is. Once a child is old enough to start noticing differences between boys and girls, they should have their own rooms.
RedPillSucks 33
Hug and kiss him. Tell him that you're attracted to him because of all the Axe he uses. Hopefully, that'll scare the shit out of him and he'll never use Axe again. If it turns him on, however... Well, then you've got other problems. TTFN.
elenaunlucky 10
hide his axe somewhere ...i did d same wid my sis' victorias secret......she became broke by d 5th time trying to buy it again and again and my car cleaner more richer and happier...
laden_swallow09 35
32- Remedial English for you, then!
Smoldering 15
Hey a tip to guys everywhere, less is more when we go to hug you, or even stand near you we don't want to choke on your body spray. Less is more, spray on just a bit so when we go to hug you or stand near you we can smell it. Please don't douse yourself with it's not attractive.
RedPillSucks 33
That's the whole point. Pick out a pretty girl. Walk past her and as she chokes and passes out from a whiff of your Axe cloud, you can drag her off to where ever. Sounds like a good plan to me.
Smoldering 15
I have a feeling that you would not be a person I would want to meet on a deserted sidewalk...............
RedPillSucks 33
Nah. I hate all that Axe stuff. Just POD for me (plain old deodorant)
crisanba 18
Those damn allergies.... Tisk tisk tisk sorry op
JE553 9
Ah axe, pepper spray available to anyone at discount prices
swedeNix 13
Switch his axe with lady parfume
Llamanator9913 16
How do you live? Pee is perfumed like.
Aero_x 21
I actually think the brand reeks. Smells kind of fake and not like 'teen spirit'. Plus, my father uses it rather than the 'old spice', so it is no good for a guy to be smellin' like my old man .-. Awkward!
CaptAir 6
Move into the living room or something? A Fan? Window?