Today, my 13-year-old son discovered Axe. Axe shower gel. Axe shampoo. Axe body spray. All at once. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my son sprayed Axe body-spray all over the house in the vain hope of covering up the scent of the joints he'd been smoking. FML
Today, my pre-teen brother has started using the entire Axe line because he believes that it will give him an "edge with the ladies". He insists on using the products at least three times a day, including before bedtime. I'm allergic to anything that is perfumed. We share a room. FML
Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mom got him a shitload of Axe for his birthday. Now I get nauseous whenever I go near him. FML
Today, my 12-year-old son and 13-year-old daughter sprayed themselves with a ton of deodorant and perfume respectively. The two clouds of spray have combined into a noxious gas that slowly traveled through the house, giving everybody an instant, massive headache. Everybody, except my son and daughter. They think they smell great. FML
Today, my Axe shampoo, body wash, and deodorant finally did their job: they got a girl to notice me. Too bad the girl was my grandma. FML
Today, my teenage son tried to huff a can of spray paint. FML
Today, I came home and found a can of body spray. My parents get me a new scent whenever they go shopping, which is usually at least twice a week. They left a note: "Do you get it yet?" FML
Today, my son thought it would be a great idea to spray a whole can of spray tan all over my freshly-painted white bathroom walls as an "experiment". He's 18. FML
Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML
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Top comments
hunterfisher98 8
Let the smells begin..
saIty 17
Make sure you don't light a lighter.
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Comments (185)
hunterfisher98 8
Let the smells begin..
iarefatal 9
And may the odors be ever in your favor
imavelociraptor 6
Just don't let him invite over his friends Katniss Evergreen and Peeta MellOHMYGOSHYOUSTINK!
Drigr 9
Axe isn't really that bad aside from the bodyspray. None of the shampoos I used were over the top. I bounce between Phoenix and Chocolate bodywash + deodorant and while the bodywash may be a bit strong for the first 10 minutes or so, its still not too bad and the deodorant seems to actually work pretty good.
chickenflem 8
Been there smelt that. My brother recently gave up all those.
klol_fml 11
Did he discover it axedentally?
MDTeddy 13
Some axe smells very bad.
Cbizzlez 10
Ah freshman year lol
nogood9 4
Be careful, axe users spray axe on everything from other people to furniture.
Helper_fml 6
indeed...
crystalxa 35
My boyfriend is the same way. I can smell him coming from a mile away! Some of them smell really good, but usually they are a little too strong especially when its complete body care!
saIty 17
Make sure you don't light a lighter.
gc327072 31
Miners get black lung disease, tools get axehysema.
Nolonger 11
#2, I think OP should light a lighter....
melij99 5
For some reason teenage boys love axe products. My brother in law is the same way.
herpderpherpderp 13
may god have mercy on your soul.
seriouslythat 6
3 in high school I would hate when guys would spray it in class and everyone walked out smelling like it the smell wouldn't come off :/
WritingWrongs 8
"Ooh, commercial show pretty women like that stuff. Maybe I wear that stuff, pretty women like me too. Me buy! ME BUY NOW!" (Just read that in a cave man accent.)
MikeFoxtrot01594 11
at 3 We only use that stuff to cover up even worse smells like football pads that we have gone half a season without washing.
Poppipuff 14
But do teenage girls love axe products as well ?
Pyro_Wolf 17
I'm a teenage guy (16) and I hate axe. My friend likes to spray me with his axe body spray to annoy me...
MormonPornstar 7
Old Spice deodorant and antiperspirant smells great and doesn't make the whole lockeroom choke. Invest
Sir_Swaggington 6
Old spice reminds me of old dudes. Might just be me though because my grandpa used it.
MormonPornstar 7
There's 5-6 new scents for the deodorant at least. They're not as Gramp-ish.
sallyfastcat 2
Replace everything of his with bacon scented shower gel, bacon scented shampoo, and bacon scented body spray. Everything will be ok, OP...I promise.
imavelociraptor 6
Don't forget to buy a Rottweiler to go with it.
LollipopDragon 4
Well the Rottweiler is a bit extreme...
desoto96 9
Yummmmmm....Bacon.
green2go 14
This is FML nothing is too extreme
joep1 7
That smell must be strong. Be prepared for your nostrils and lungs to burn
ineslovescats 5
Is he aware that girls will not actually go up to him and rub his head like in the commercial?
sallyfastcat 2
When I read this, I imagined the girls rubbing the guy's head down south. Then I got outraged on why they would air a commercial like that on tv. But then I realized I just had a ****** up dirty mind.
thursday817 6
God dammit that doesn't actually happen!? What the hell am I to do with all these axe products now?
imavelociraptor 6
Give them to OP's son maybe?
xxenforcerxx 4
does it count that some axe sprays get my girlfriend all over me..?
farkie3 8
44, not really. I mean, I've been drinking the stuff for weeks and it's not done anything for me yet. It must work differently if you're in a relationship.
xxenforcerxx 4
49. drinking it..? that must taste lovely. nice breathe i suppose
rageandlove13 8
I get migraines when I smell axe...
kotana191 8
and your gonna get to know what each of them smells like. all. at. once.
asinforasin 1
They all smell the same...
kotana191 8
if you get all the same scent, then yes. it does come in different smells ya'know
spikey818 9
Atleast he will smell good and have ladies all over him right?
thursday817 6
Please refer to comment 7
imavelociraptor 6
Awww that's so cute! You think girls like it when guys smell like car freshener for people...
sissycullen 4
Yeah, because every parent wants the "ladies all over" their 13 year-old son...
imavelociraptor 6
107- i do not think that word means what you think it means...
RedmontFief 7
Inconceivable!
prioo 6
Your poor nose OP! :(
Roguedork19 8
Don't worry op, someday he will grow up and become mature. Then he will use Old Spice.
BlowinChronic 18
Yeah man, I switched from axe to old spice and it's certainly a change for the better.
imavelociraptor 6
Like a sir...
ManInTheMachine 20
Smell like a man, man!
countryrose92 23
This totally cracked me up.
Synistiel 14
55- Good to know.
dino_cookie4 7
I prefer old spice ( Fiji gel ) deodorant , its waayy better than axe .
184886837272837 32
Old Spice Denali is my personal favorite. I've had many girls come up to me just to tell me that I smell good with it.