Today, my mom found my pack of cigarettes. She's now making me go to rehab. I had only smoked one cigarette ever just to try it. I didn't even like it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom found my dad's hidden stash of cigarettes. He told her they were mine and now I have to spend two hours at therapy for my "smoking problem" every weekend. I've never smoked. FML
Today, my mom found a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. She hates smoking, so she tore every single cigarette to pieces, then emptied a bag of kitty litter on them. On my bed. FML
Today, my mom spent over $200 getting me tested for every drug in the book. All because I admitted to smoking a single cigarette two years ago. FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, my parents found cigarettes in my car. After a long argument lasting over an hour, I convinced them that they weren't mine and that I don't smoke. A few minutes later, I went to work. Guess who decided to visit me during my smoke break. FML
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
Today, my mom held an intervention for me. Yesterday, I told her I'd tried pot once. Seven years ago. FML
Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
dobiesFTW 1
watch out for the guy saying, "rehab? you came to rehab for cigarettes? I used to suck dick for coke. have you ever sucked dick for cigarettes?!"
alunajoy 5
Rehab just for cigarettes?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (336)
kisseshugsdrugs 5
rehab for cigarettes? reallyyy? i ******* HATE when parents send their kids to rehab for stupid things like smoking a cigarette or weed. do you know what kids learn at rehab? what drugs get you more ****** up than smoking a blunt. every person i know who was sent to rehab for smoking weed came out of rehab with an oxycotin problem.
wellinever 5
If you only tried one and didn't like it then rehab should be a breeze. You've already passed.
xgetxbentx 13
why would you waste like 7 bucks to try one cigarette when you could have just bummed a drag off of someone else's for free....
teaanddinosaurs 1
TRYING is how people learn what to do, and what not to do. Trying to climb a tree is how kids learn how far they can go before they get into trouble. Trying new foods is how you learn what you like and don't like. This guy tried a cigarette to see what it was like - the fact that he didn't like it has made him learn that he doesn't want to smoke. Who cares if he bought a pack to try? It doesn't mean that he'll end up smoking the whole thing, it's probably just the least embarrassing way to buy them.
Lisa89 3
so rehab should be easy for you then? Turn it into something fun lol
dbikes60 0
its called supersize me
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
No, there's a similar one about weed called Super High Me. Supersize Me is the McDonald's one.
nkkataeva 0
If you wanted to try then why buy the whole pack. Buying the whole pack means that you intended to smoke it all. If you wanted to try, ask someone, like a friend, for a cigarette.
Kongo 0
Nor do you #10
EddieYoung1991 0
seriously? well ur Indian and If your Muslim then ur not allowed...maybe that's why she's pissed?
flamegrilled123 3
as soon as you said your mum found your cigarettes, I clicked YDI