Today, my mom found my pack of cigarettes. She's now making me go to rehab. I had only smoked one cigarette ever just to try it. I didn't even like it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom found my dad's hidden stash of cigarettes. He told her they were mine and now I have to spend two hours at therapy for my "smoking problem" every weekend. I've never smoked. FML
Today, my mom found a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. She hates smoking, so she tore every single cigarette to pieces, then emptied a bag of kitty litter on them. On my bed. FML
Today, my mom spent over $200 getting me tested for every drug in the book. All because I admitted to smoking a single cigarette two years ago. FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, my parents found cigarettes in my car. After a long argument lasting over an hour, I convinced them that they weren't mine and that I don't smoke. A few minutes later, I went to work. Guess who decided to visit me during my smoke break. FML
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
Today, my mom held an intervention for me. Yesterday, I told her I'd tried pot once. Seven years ago. FML
Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML
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Top comments
dobiesFTW 1
watch out for the guy saying, "rehab? you came to rehab for cigarettes? I used to suck dick for coke. have you ever sucked dick for cigarettes?!"
alunajoy 5
Rehab just for cigarettes?
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Comments (336)
bozo92 0
lol you cant go to rehab for cigs, its legal dude..
NightGod 0
I'm sure there are plenty of private facilities that will be more than happy to accept OPs parent's money.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
YDI for buying them in the first place and then not getting rid of them when you found out you didn't like it. What a waste of money.
steggy97 0
y would u buy a pack of them if u only tried them once an u didnt like them
senseofreason 0
she can't make you if you're 18... and you MUST be 18 to buy cigs
ManaUser 0
Wow. Your mother most be the stupidest person alive.
afg3 0
y did u even try one
untfan2012 0
You deserve this beyond belief. Once you take that first drag, you're hooked onto nicotine. My mom smokes and it's SO nasty. Congrats, jackass. You're addicted. Now pack your bags and don't let the doorknob hit your ass on the way out.
penguinazul 13
Here's another nonsmoker that knows nothing about what they're talking about. I actually know a lot of smokers who don't even do it for the nicotine -- they do it more-so for the action (having something in your hand/mouth). You do not get hooked on the first drag. From a personal view, I started smoking 4 years ago and never really got "addicted". I can go a long time without having a cigarette; it's not so much an addiction for me as a bad habit. It's something to do; it's social (I met most of my friends in college from our "smoking wall"), it gives me something to do with my hands, something to put in my mouth, it's relaxing, it feels good...there's so many reasons as to why people smoke aside from just the nicotine. This kid isn't going to suffer THAT greatly just from smoking. If that's the worse thing the kid ever does, then I think he/she is doing alright. It's not illegal unless he's underage, and it doesn't cause him to be unable to function or make decisions. No, it's not the best choice in the world to make, but it's definitely NOT the worse; not something that requires rehab, anyway. Send your kids to rehab when they have real problems, like an alcohol or hardcore drug addiction (crack, heroine, Oxycontin, etc), not for smoking cigarettes. Otherwise, you're just running the risk for your child to come home with a WAY bigger problem than a smoking habit. I had to go to an alcohol/drug rehab type class when I misread a kid's ID and ended up accidentally selling beer to a minor; I learned WAY more about drugs and alcohol than I needed to know -- fortunately for me, I took it as a lesson learned to never mess with the hard shit and to control myself when it came to alcohol. Some kids will take it as a lesson to further extend their curiosity, and will end up far worse off than they were before rehab. Think about this shit when you go cheering on the parents for their stupid decisions. My apologies for the novel part, haha. I'm an English major; I can't help it.
Cirri 0
I only smoked socially (while out drinking with friends once or twice every few weeks) for years before I became addicted and started to feel cravings. Don't try and preach about things you're ignorant about
CeSbAlLa4lYfe 0
ewww, smoking is disgusting!
kianakianakiana 0
why would you even try it dumb ****