Today, my mom found my pack of cigarettes. She's now making me go to rehab. I had only smoked one cigarette ever just to try it. I didn't even like it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom found my dad's hidden stash of cigarettes. He told her they were mine and now I have to spend two hours at therapy for my "smoking problem" every weekend. I've never smoked. FML
Today, my mom found a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. She hates smoking, so she tore every single cigarette to pieces, then emptied a bag of kitty litter on them. On my bed. FML
Today, my mom spent over $200 getting me tested for every drug in the book. All because I admitted to smoking a single cigarette two years ago. FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, my parents found cigarettes in my car. After a long argument lasting over an hour, I convinced them that they weren't mine and that I don't smoke. A few minutes later, I went to work. Guess who decided to visit me during my smoke break. FML
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
Today, my mom held an intervention for me. Yesterday, I told her I'd tried pot once. Seven years ago. FML
Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML
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Top comments
dobiesFTW 1
watch out for the guy saying, "rehab? you came to rehab for cigarettes? I used to suck dick for coke. have you ever sucked dick for cigarettes?!"
alunajoy 5
Rehab just for cigarettes?
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Comments (336)
insomniac8400 13
boo this man! boo!
jpqm32 3
YDI dont do it in the first place idiot.
zanderman529 7
The first step of recovery is to accept your problem lol
YoshiPL 8
I tried them once too. Hated them, couldn't believe how someone can like it. A few years later my parents started smoking yet again. I stopped them a few months ago.
Testing1234 25
Why would you keep it if you didnt like it?!?!
Gassystevie 6
Probably should have thrown those out
ninja_darkstar 6
Why do you expect people to sympathize with you for doing something stupid an suffering the consequences
HunkyMumbles 27
As long as you don't keep on Doing it. You were curious, and I get it, but as long as you don't keep on doing it.
tuxedoandex 28
not even once.
MozillaHostile 21
"Let's see if I like them. If I do, chances are I'll develop a ha it that will ruin my life forever. Oh well!"