Today, my girlfriend left me. Knowing that I am a germaphobe, she took all of my cleaning supplies and spread mud and trash everywhere. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend left me. When she moved out, she even took the light bulbs with her. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend moved out. I came back to a sparsely furnished home; she'd even taken the shower head, my beard trimmer, and the soap from the bathroom. FML
Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML
Today, I came home to my empty apartment. My girlfriend had left a note on the floor that said: "Took my stuff and left. Took your stuff and pawned it." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I refused to share a toothbrush with her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after a year of living together. She told me that she met someone else and wanted to move out. She moved out... but moved her things into my roommate's bedroom. FML
Today, my not-yet-even girlfriend dumped me in front of her family, as they all mocked and laughed at me because of my pointless and ridiculous "quirks". I'd told them that I shower and change into fresh clothes every day. I'd also said do not wipe after I poop, but I wash, soap, rinse, and dry. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into an argument while she was in the bathroom. I told her I was leaving her because she's too needy. She came out of the bathroom and threw her used tampon at me. FML
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Top comments
mofran 0
shit on her doorstep. don't worry bro, **** that bitch & move on.
wisese 0
Your girlfriend is an immature child. Even if you were a horrible boyfriend, she has proven to be a rather low creature because she couldn't simply leave you; she evidently thought it was appropriate to attack you. Class act. Be glad she's gone op.
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Comments (149)
bgraber04 1
haha ex gf FTW!!
OfficeNinja 5
File a police report, if you find anything the bitch left behind donate it to Goodwill, clean up, and forget her. Breakups happen, but getting petty and damaging property for no reason is just unnecessary. Get your stuff, leave, and that's it. Spreading garbage and mud everywhere, then stealing your cleaning stuff, probably means SHE is at fault here.
mbrooks5110 0
Either she's a huge bitch or you did something to deserve that.
perdix 31
Um, . . . that's not mud. The good news is that exposing yourself to pathogens can really strengthen your immune system. Or kill you.
CALIGIRLFYL 0
Lol that is seriously funny... Wonder what made her go all crazy
2dog 15
Wow she must have hated op
roadie42 21
Jeez, what an inconsiderate, dramatic bitch. I'm sorry it had to end in such an awful way, but at least you're done with her for good, OP :)
hateevryone 15
wow....ya'll must've been on bad terms. REVENGE!!!!
RomanBeauty 0
What a bitch!!! But did you do something to really deserve it?
rukiddingme854 0
Roflmao that's funny shit.