Today, my girlfriend left me. Knowing that I am a germaphobe, she took all of my cleaning supplies and spread mud and trash everywhere. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend left me. When she moved out, she even took the light bulbs with her. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend moved out. I came back to a sparsely furnished home; she'd even taken the shower head, my beard trimmer, and the soap from the bathroom. FML
Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML
Today, I came home to my empty apartment. My girlfriend had left a note on the floor that said: "Took my stuff and left. Took your stuff and pawned it." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I refused to share a toothbrush with her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after a year of living together. She told me that she met someone else and wanted to move out. She moved out... but moved her things into my roommate's bedroom. FML
Today, my not-yet-even girlfriend dumped me in front of her family, as they all mocked and laughed at me because of my pointless and ridiculous "quirks". I'd told them that I shower and change into fresh clothes every day. I'd also said do not wipe after I poop, but I wash, soap, rinse, and dry. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into an argument while she was in the bathroom. I told her I was leaving her because she's too needy. She came out of the bathroom and threw her used tampon at me. FML
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Top comments
mofran 0
shit on her doorstep. don't worry bro, **** that bitch & move on.
wisese 0
Your girlfriend is an immature child. Even if you were a horrible boyfriend, she has proven to be a rather low creature because she couldn't simply leave you; she evidently thought it was appropriate to attack you. Class act. Be glad she's gone op.
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Comments (149)
Nucl3arMoos3 7
And that my friend is what we call bitch
clanon 4
What a bitch...
jrule 0
Abviously she wanted to get you back for something you did. Oh well go on and enjoy life.
aleasucks 0
Damn what a bitch. But you gotta give her some credit, she clearly knew how to piss you off.
eatpraylovee44 0
HAHAHAHA good for her. XD
Humanspider 18
Why would someone do that? Breaking up with someone does not mean people need to become bitches. I never understood why society condones acts of pointless revenge.
juicyfruit222 0
Lmaoo something I wud do if u were a jerk off
theonlysweetpea 10
What a bitch! I hope you put on a rubber glove
ALLDAY88 8
Take a dump, put it in her oven and bake that shit.
kittybaby01 10
you must have done something to piss her off so YDI.