Today, my dog threw up on my bed while I was sleeping. I lost an hour of the day washing the vomit out with a rag, and my garbage disposal jammed on whatever otherworldly things my dog ate the day before. I had to dig it out by hand. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dog had REALLY bad diarrhea. I found that out when I woke up to find it all over my bed. FML
Today, instead of waking up to soft sunlight creeping in the window or the gentle trill of birds, I was awakened by the sound of my dog vomiting all over my bed. FML
Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML
Today, my dog threw up on the tiled floor. I found out at 6 this morning in the dark when I slipped and fell in it. FML
Today, my dog woke me up with the sound of vomiting. I immediately got up and tried to figure out what he was doing. After 30 minutes, he didn’t vomit, just kept making the sounds. I banished him from my presence for some more shuteye. FML
Today, I was woken up by a funky smell. My dog had eaten a dead bird and thrown up all over my bed and floor. At 4 o'clock in the morning I had to clean up regurgitated bits of bird, feathers, blood and dog food. The smell still hasn't gone away. FML
Today, I woke up approximately half a nanosecond after my dog involuntarily vomited in bed. On my face. I opened my mouth because it literally filled my nose. I swallowed out of reflex before I was fully awake. FML
Today, I got a new comfy duvet and pillow and was looking forward to a good night's sleep. I got into bed and was followed by my dog, who then threw up the tub of butter he had just stolen from the kitchen onto my brand new bed spread. FML
Today, I discovered my dog pooped in my bed, under the covers, by rolling over onto it. FML
Today, I couldn’t tell that my puppy had an upset stomach before I left for work. I came home to her covered in shit inside her crate. After cleaning her up and almost being done with the mess, my husband found where she had tried to lick herself clean and then vomited it up in our bedroom. FML
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Top comments
Pentium_4 27
man, being a dog would be quite the life. while you're cleaning up the mess they made, he/she is probably relaxing on the couch licking their privates
theWINDOWmonster 3
Why would you put it in the disposal? As opposed to something that makes more sense, like ohh.. the trash?
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Comments (46)
bada55b1tch 3
Ydi for making the clean up harder than it had to be. Next time throw the barf in the trash and wash your sheets!
I_am_original 1
What in the world did the garbage disposal have to do with this situation..? thats not what that thing is for...
jamaicanbunny 0
Why would you put it down the sink? That's disgusting, why wouldn't you just throw it away..
onealmxwilson 18
I would go throw up the dog's bed...
onealmxwilson 18
* in the dog's bed
cheyluvsturtles 30
gross
millsjoshua949 12
Huh? What does your dog puking on your bed have to do with your garbage disposal?? And you were using a rag to clean it up? I'm just so confused by this. ydi.