Today, I had a consultation for an upcoming surgery I need done. The doctor (who is very handsome and in his late twenties) asked me to flex my stomach and act like I was trying to use the bathroom. As I was enjoying him touching my stomach, I farted. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was very tense as I sat in the chair for my gyno appointment, so the doctor repeatedly told me to relax, in order for her to do the routine exam. I then overcompensated and relaxed so much, I accidentally farted in her face. FML
Today, at physical therapy, I felt that all-too-familiar gurgle in my gut, but I thought it would a light, silent fart. I squatted for an exercise and shit my pants in front of the cute, single, male physical therapist. He definitely noticed. I still had 30 minutes left in the session. FML
Today, I was nervously observing a delicate medical procedure while training at my new job. I tried to stifle a sneeze and instead (as you can probably guess) ripped the biggest, most cartoonishly loud fart of my life. My ass sounded like a tuba and I was asked to leave the room. FML
Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML
Today, I noticed a guy checking out my ass in the mirror behind the bar where I work. He was cute, so I thought I'd put on a little show. I bent over to reach for something near the floor, which caused me to let rip a series of uncontrollable farts, like popping bubble wrap. He quickly left. FML
Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML
Today, I was sitting in the doctor's waiting room and thought that I was alone. I let rip two massive farts before realising there was a very short woman behind the computer screen at the desk. FML
Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML
Today, I went to my GP to discuss my anxiety. As I was explaining my symptoms, I accidentally farted loudly due to my nervousness. The doctor paused and said, "Well, let's address that as well." FML.
Today, at the age of 25, for the first time in my life, I was lying mostly naked in front of a man while he was inserting something in my body. Too bad that man was a doctor and that thing was a colonoscopy. FML
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Top comments
HurriKaty 4
Hey, well he asked you to pretend like you were using the bathroom, so you did...
HeyitsPheddy 0
Women don't fart. So this is a fake.
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Comments (91)
HurriKaty 4
Hey, well he asked you to pretend like you were using the bathroom, so you did...
Ughsucks 0
Indeed.... To the OP: Don't worry OP, you didn't have a chance with the doctor anyway. I'm sure you realize, he's probably at home banging his trophy wife right now.
sloppyflow 1
or trophy husband
murlocholmes 5
... did no one notice the doctor close his eyes and shudder at the exact same time?
Krystal3408 32
Yeah just be like "we'll that's what acting is, Trying to make people believe you're really in the situation"
xxmollyxx 25
Surely that must happen all the time. Still embarrassing tho
curryndricegirll 0
actually...that's the whole point. they actually can't do surgery if you have gas. if you do...they give you medicine to let it all out. so yeah, he actually was trying to get you to fart.
sadistmonkey 19
um...#44, you're talking about right before the surgery, not during a "consultation for an upcoming surgery"
Bizzile 0
hahahhaha truee.
drummerelx 0
don't call me surely
guppyskater 0
better than a queef.
spillproof 0
haha true. OP: That made me laugh, thank you!
alexgisforme3 0
looool. thats so embarassing :(
HeyitsPheddy 0
Women don't fart. So this is a fake.
lolzforfun228 3
lol. This would be even funnier if you wern't joking.
cheesefest 0
Women farting, just like The Cake, is a lie...
BagelPower 0
67- You rock. Portal was one of (and still is), my favourite games. The cake IS a lie.
chelzy 0
76, yer wrong. the cake is real. at least it was. but I ate it.
SmokinGuns 13
She doesn't get the joke.
primespore 12
Just like portal
doomking10 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Well there is your first problem. You weren't in the kitchen.
HPfan 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
cucumberfabulous 7
LOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
evildemonchild 18
LMFAO!!
mariof13579 4
This made me crack the hell up.
generationaliya 7
Hmm, I'm guessing you didn't get the first part of the post correctly, it's alright though, we don't expect much from men anyways.
WTFIWWP 0
hahahaha doctors do not care about that sort of thing, now flirt
stomp_a_baby 0
Did he burst into laughter?:) I would have! :D
lottofee 0
and who cares? #7 ftw :)
fallenarchangel 0
Agree with #6